Wildfire I  Fire's Rising
by EGrace
Summary: What if there had been another mutant going through trials and tribulations of her own, just outside of the XMen movies' action, who could put a different spin on things?


Title: Fire's Rising, Book I of The Wildfire Trilogy

Author: Elizabeth Grace

Dated: May 2007

Environ: X-Men The Movie

Categories: English / 32,380 words / Adventure; Angst; Drama; Sci Fi

Rating: "M" This story is intended for mature audiences age 16 and over. It contains scenes of explicit sexuality and includes some mild language.

Disclaimer: _The Wildfire Trilogy_ is written by a fan for fans for the sole purpose of enjoyment. It is not intended to infringe upon copyrights held by 20th Century Fox, Marvel Enterprises, X-Men creators Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, authors and screenwriters Tom DeSanto, Bryan Singer, David Hayter, Zak Penn, Michael Dougherty, Dan Harris, and Simon Kinberg, or any other licensed holders of copyrights to the X-Men comic books or movies.

Distribution: I'd be honored if fellow fans create links on their sites to this story or share it with even more fans via distribution lists. I would ask only that you give credit (or blame, as the case may be) to the author. A little advance warning of your intentions would also be nice.

Feedback: Definitely welcome, whether good, bad, or indifferent. "That which does not kill me will only make me stronger."

Spoilers: _The Wildfire Trilogy_ (_Fire's Rising, Fire's Price, Fire's Promise) _is meticulously threaded through the three X-Men movies. You can't read these stories without at least a passing recollection of the movies, nor can you read these stories without learning what happens in the movies.

Acknowledgements: I never would have written this if I hadn't fallen in love with the X-Men comic books when I was a kid. The characters inspired me, the stories enthralled me, and to this day, Storm remains one of my favorite characters of all time.

Premise: I hated X3. I hated that Scott was marginalized and no one seemed to care what was happening to him; I hated that Jean was so obviously open to Logan's advances; and I hated that she killed Scott and did _whatever_ to the Professor. So as I walked out of the theatre I wondered… and then I plotted… and finally I asked, what if there had been someone else there all along, just outside of the movies' action, another mutant going through trials and tribulations of her own who could put a different spin on things?

Notes: I only saw X3 once and have no plans to see it again. So if there's anything in _The Wildfire Trilogy_ which conflicts with X3, that's why.

One last thing: Try not to get too worked up over how far I roamed from X-Men canon with Scott. First of all, the movie screenwriters went off the page long before I did. But mostly, I figured the guy got such a raw deal in X3, he deserved a little bit of fun and undivided attention.

X One

Scott Summers banked the X-Men jet into a slow arc, coming around to begin the search pattern in the late afternoon skies over New York for the second time. "Storm?"

Beside him Ororo frowned, her eyes flicking ceaselessly across the sensor display, her gloved fingers drumming a random tattoo on the console. "I've got nothing. Maybe we--"

_"I've found her, Scott."_ The Professor's crisp voice came cleanly over the comms. _"She's in a warehouse on the west side of Manhattan--somewhere along the Hudson."_

"Charting a course," Storm said calmly, her fingers flying across the console now. Scott frowned at the heading she fed him, even as he banked into another turn and throttled up.

"What's a circus performer doing that far from Madison Square Garden two hours before her performance?" he protested. "Are you sure you're reading the right person, Professor?"

_"Hurry, Scott,"_ the Professor said--and now Scott couldn't miss the tension in his mentor's voice. _"She's frightened and in a great deal of pain."_

_Damn it._ What were they walking into--and would they get there too late to do anything about it? "Understood, Professor. Storm, I need a place to land. Get me as close as you--"

"Oh my God," Storm gasped. "I'm reading a fire along the water front. It just flared up out of nowhere--and it's _huge_."

"Liliana August is definitely down there," Scott acknowledged grimly. And they were definitely too late. What the hell was going on? "Get me that landing spot."

X Two

_Lovely, lovely HEAT and FLAMES, sizzling along her nerves, exploding in her gut, burning burning burning. Heat roared in her ears, popping and crackling and snarling. Fire blazed, higher and higher, nothing but crimson and orange and gold dancing seductive and sensuous in her vision._

_It was everywhere--HEAT and FLAMES--SHE was everywhere--nothing but fury and fire and scorching, blistering, searing, lovely, lovely HEAT._

_This was what she was. This was _all_ she was. Finally, finally, she would burn and burn and burn until the pain and the fury were gone and not even the fear remained._

_Yesssss… She would burn and burn and burrrrnnnnnnn… _

_WATER COLD WATER--crashing WATER--beating her throbbing back, smothering her and drenching her lovely FLAMES and smashing her down--_

She screamed and sucked in water and choked and fell moaning, shivering, to her knees. Reaching for heat, needing the heat back--_where was the HEAT?!_

"Liliana?"

Not Max, _not Max_ or that disgusting--

"Liliana? Can you hear me?"

The voice was calm, soothing, gently compelling, and she raised her head, vaguely surprized it was still attached, blinked rain and the last of the flickering flames from her eyes. Two of them, a man and a woman, _not Max or_-- in odd black leather costumes, one with red eyes, the other with white, watching her with silence and caution and complete focus.

"We're here to help," the man said in that beautiful voice. "Are you all right?"

_Was she all right?_ Lili blinked at the unwavering red stare. Why would they care?

"_Liliana,_" he said, urgently now, "this fire stretches for three blocks, and Storm's rain can't reach everywhere. There are people trapped in some of these buildings! _Can you put the fire out?_"

_People?_ Lili lurched to her feet, spinning, stumbling, searching desperately, but there were no life-size piles of smoldering ashes. They must have gotten out before--

_People--trapped--_

_Oh, God… No…_

Lili closed her eyes and threw her arms wide and _reached, reached wide--far--for HEAT, for FLAMES, for that which burned and scorched and seared--and called and called, come back to me, come, COME, until she stretched thin and brittle across the endless cold and silence, until she was nothing but that single, pain-filled word, whispered over and over in blackness._

_Nothing. Nothing. She couldn't do this, she'd never tried to call the heat _to_ her before, it wouldn't come back--it wouldn't come back!--despair cutting through her like an icy blade. There was nothing, she was nothing, and--_

_"You're nothing."_

_No, no, Max was gone, he was gone, she'd finally made him afraid of her, she hadn't meant to, it had just happened--_

_"You're nothing!"_

_The blow had staggered her, fear rising acrid in her mouth and brittle in her gut now as it had then. _She faltered, shaking, stepping back. _No--NO--he was gone--wasn't he?_

_He always comes back, the fear whispered. And he's going to be so mad…_

She set her feet and gritted her teeth and clutched at the embers that burned always within her and _REACHED._

_A whiff of smoke gave her the strength to stretch farther, farther, again, more. An instant of warmth against her fingertips, a flicker of heat in the depths of her soul-- More, more, come to me, come TO ME, the call a desperate scream within her now--_

_And the fire ROARED, snapping back, scorching her breath, dancing on her skin and writhing in her belly, heat in her face, flames ROARING within her, drenching her with rolling, searing HEAT. With heat. Burning. She was burning… With lovely, lovely heat…_

She staggered, blind and deaf to everything but the conflagration she'd harnessed, that _licked and hissed_ and consumed the last of her strength and slowly, sullenly, _flickered_ lower and lower. But it didn't go out. The fire never went out. Not as long as there was breath in her body.

She'd done it. The fire in the buildings, at least, was out, and the one within her was quiet. Lili dropped her aching arms and drew a long, shuddering sigh as some last, tiny, stubborn spark of life still left in her forced her heavy eyes open.

The two of them were still there. Had even drawn closer, despite what they'd just seen her do. They were poised, tense, waiting--she realized now--for her to collapse.

"We're here to help," he repeated, slowly. Through the odd device covering half his face, he drew her eyes to his with a calm, steady gaze. "I'm Cyclops, and this is Storm."

_Cyclops. Storm. _They belonged in the circus, with names like that. Not Max's, though. He'd never have anyone that strong, anyone who could stand up to him. And _they_ would stand up to him. She stared at them, frowning, sadness rolling over her like a wave. Why couldn't she be that strong?

"What do you want from me?" she rasped, trying to at least _sound_ strong and fierce and not at all like her vision was darkening or her heartbeat was pounding in her ears or her knees were buckling--

Cyclops caught her as she sagged, easing down with her in a tangled heap. "Liliana?"

She tried--to answer, to tell them to leave her alone, to get back up and run somewhere, anywhere--but all she managed was a low, low moan. She would have been afraid, he had his hands on her, but there was nothing left in her for anything at all.

Cool, smooth, leathered fingers brushed her snarled, sodden hair back from her face. "It's all right," that beautiful voice soothed. "We'll take you someplace safe, where you can rest. That's all we want. I promise."

More hands, straightening her legs with care and easy strength. "I think she did it--I think the fire's completely out." The woman--and her voice held all the sweet rain and gentle breezes that Lili had ever longed for. "Is she all right?"

"I don't like the look of these marks on her arms. And why is she bleeding… _Sonofabitch_. We need to get her back to Jean. _Now._" The words came from far away, clipped and angry, but she just couldn't make herself care. What they did with her, they did with her. What did it matter?

Max would find her. He would _never _let her go. It was only a matter of time. _He was going to be so mad._

_"You're nothing!"_

Nothing. She knew that. Nothing.

… _except the fire, embers banked and glowering in her belly…_

X Three

"Then she… just… sucked it all back into her," Scott finished, shrugging helplessly, wishing he had the words to describe the inexplicable rush that had torn through his body as the flames had all howled out of existence. "I know your contact said her act was for real, Professor, but controlling the flames in a small space is a far cry from a three-block perimeter. Once we got there and saw the extent of the fire, I didn't think she'd be able to do anything to help put it out."

Xavier rubbed at his jaw, thoughtful and distant, and not for the first time Scott wondered what his mentor was thinking. "Was anyone hurt?" Scott asked instead.

The Professor shook his head. "Nothing serious. The last report was a dozen people hospitalized for minor injuries and already released. Mostly smoke inhalation, and three or four with minor burns. We were lucky."

Ororo turned abruptly from one of the office windows. "But _she_ was hurt. Somebody beat that poor girl--badly. Who would have done that to her? And _why_?"

The Professor sighed, a world of sadness in the simple sound. "_Who_ was the owner of the circus, Maximillian Sarkaroff. There were three others with them when I found her, but he was the one with the belt. As to why, I'm not certain."

"My God," Scott choked, disgust clogging his throat and anger tightening his chest. It would be a long time before he forgot the sight of Liliana August's back. "What else would someone want with a fire starter--_they wanted her to burn something_. If she said no…"

"Unfortunately," the Professor scowled, "that is all too likely what happened. Which might also explain the _size _of the fire. My contact said her act was on a moderate scale, and his impression was that, while her skills were genuine, and not mere 'smoke and mirrors,' they were certainly not on the scale that you saw today."

Scott stiffened. "Are you saying her powers might not have been at full strength before this?"

"You did the research, Scott," the Professor said softly. "Liliana August has been performing under Maximillian Sarkaroff since she was approximately eight years old. Mutations tend to manifest at puberty--but not always, and apparently not for her. They also tend to grow in strength as the individual matures--_but not always_. We could quite possibly be looking at an extremely powerful mutant whose full abilities were not awakened until today, years later, by abuse."

Ororo closed her eyes, rubbing her hands restlessly up and down her arms, and Scott realized his fists were clenched. Slowly, carefully, he opened his hands. Anger wouldn't help this girl. "What do we do next, Professor?"

"We let her heal."

"That's easier said than done," Jean said, low and quietly furious, from the doorway.

"How is she, Jean?" Xavier asked.

"I've never seen anyone so completely exhausted, Professor. She's deeply in shock and nearly comatose. Worse, she's malnourished and dehydrated and has been for some time." Jean paused, and Scott moved to take her hand in his while she fought for composure.

"As if that wasn't bad enough," Jean continued, soft and bitter, "her back is in shreds, and there are bruises and defensive wounds on her arms. I've dressed everything and started two IV's. It's all I can do for now."

The Professor nodded. "All right, people. Good work, all of you, but Jean and I need to leave within the hour for Washington, and I don't think we'll get anything else accomplished anyway until Liliana August wakes up. When she does, we need to make sure she doesn't feel frightened or threatened. I'll implant a suggestion of calm, but Scott, Ororo, she's seen both of you, so I'd like one of you to be with her at all times."

Ororo glanced at Jean and smiled wryly. "It might help if we move her to one of the bedrooms as well. Med lab isn't the most reassuring of places to wake up in."

Jean hesitated. "Put her near the students? What if… "

"You didn't see the fire in New York, Jean," Ororo said softly. "If Liliana decided to do the same thing here, being in the med lab wouldn't even slow her down."

There was nothing any of them could say to that, no guaranteed protection they could give, not to Liliana and not to themselves. But then, Scott hadn't felt truly safe since the day his mutation had awakened. At least he hadn't had anyone beating him. "What about this Sarkaroff?" he pressed. "We can't just let him get away with what he did."

"I'm afraid Congress won't wait for Jean's testimony," the Professor said dryly, "and between the school and our guest I'm already leaving you and Storm with enough to do. Sarkaroff will wait until we're back and Liliana is well enough to tell us what happened."

"I'll get her moved," Ororo decided. "I can sit with her first, Scott, if you can get us all locked up for tonight."

He nodded. "I'll spell you around midnight."

"Excellent. I'll see you two tomorrow night, then. Jean, I'll meet you at the car as soon as I'm done with Liliana," the Professor said, his chair whispering smoothly as he led Ororo from the room.

Jean moved to leave as well, but Scott breathed deeply to settle his anger and tugged gently on her hand and instead pulled Jean into him, savoring the feel of her long, lean body pressed against his and the sight of the slow, sultry smile growing on her face. "Good luck tomorrow," he told her, and pressed a soft kiss to her lips.

"You think I need _luck_ to handle Senator Kelly?" she teased him. But her smile didn't last. Restlessly she shifted against him and shook her head. "This Mutant Registration Act really worries me. I wish I knew how to make men like Senator Kelly see how bad an idea it is."

"If anyone can find the words, it's you," he reassured her. This time his kiss was long and slow and deep, the kind of kiss that told her _without _words how deeply he loved her, how badly he'd miss her, if only for a night and a day, and how fully he believed in her. She heard them anyway, her thoughts twining with his and deepening their kiss into a moment so profoundly intimate, so joyously loving, that he wondered, fleetingly, if they'd ever truly need the words again.

"I have to go," she finally sighed, pulling both her thoughts and her body reluctantly away. "But I hate to leave Liliana like this. Be careful with her, Scott. Call me if her breathing changes, or if she even _seems_ uncomfortable."

"She'll be fine," Scott promised, "and so will I. I'll see you tomorrow night."

He walked her to the waiting Rolls and didn't relinquish her hand until she climbed into the back next to the Professor. Watching them pull away, standing alone in the car port with a summer breeze rustling through the grounds and twilight deepening into night, he did his best to let go of his anger and he wondered. What kind of direction was the country taking, with this looming threat of mutant registration? They could lose all kinds of freedoms--humanity and mutants alike--and all in the name of "security." Despite what he'd said to Jean, he had no idea what would happen, but he was very much afraid of how bad things could get.

That was in Jean's hands for now, though. Tonight he had the responsibility of the school and _all_ its residents. What kind of direction would Liliana August take, now that she was free and safe? He'd fought his own long, difficult battles, finding control in the cold, hard discipline of his visor, finding acceptance with the Professor and the school, his life's purpose with their mission, and the love of his life--the better half of his soul--with Jean. He had the feeling that Liliana faced an equally difficult path. She was already in a place where she'd have acceptance and friendship if she wanted it, but did she have the strength to achieve her own control? Except he'd seen the struggle in her face--in her entire body--as she'd worked to put that fire out… Maybe, then, the question was, could she recover from whatever had been done to her?

X Four

_:Rest, Liliana. No one will hurt you here. Rest, and be calm. You are safe.:_

A gentle voice, soothing, reassuring,

whispering and echoing through the blackness…

birdsong… sweet and pure and…

stillness

silence

children

laughing

calling… unafraid

_Any change? Not that I can tell, Scott. But she seems comfortable. Is everyone in their rooms for the night? We've got our usual night owls still…_

_paper rustling _

_rustling_

_ rustling_

_ rustling_

Crickets.

Those were crickets.

She wondered vaguely why it had taken so long for her to figure that out.

Mmm, soft. Soft against her cheek. A soft pillow.

Cool sheets… and… a weight, across her feet… a blanket?

It was so hot, though--no, her back--it hurt, it burned, piercing her dark cocoon. But she didn't want to care, didn't want to open her eyes, didn't want to face--

_a brutal grip, holding her fast while awful, tearing pain lanced hotly across her back_

_that sly, vicious voice, threatening and promising and _laughing_ at her_

_screaming, begging for him to stop until fury exploded free and blazed and seared and purified and water… water and horrified realization and wishing it all back and…_

_gentle touches… so gentle…_

_No, surely she'd dreamed those._

_Was she dreaming now? The softness, the warmth… No, no, her back wouldn't hurt like that in a dream, would it? Her entire body wouldn't be pulsing in pain in time with her heart, beating strong and even, the sound pushing and carrying her up and up and…_

And that really was her back, hurting like hell. Lili pressed her face into the pillow and listened dully to her heart. She really was still alive. Great. Just great. Well, she knew the drill. Max was never patient enough to let her heal. She needed to get herself together, get up, get moving. She still had some of that ointment hidden in her floor--didn't she? But none of the scents and sounds were right… This certainly wasn't _her_ bed--this couldn't be her room. She wasn't with the circus? What was going on? Wait--

Red. Red eyes…

_Cyclops_. He'd said his name was Cyclops. And… and Storm. They'd watched her and promised…

It didn't matter. No one kept promises to her. Except the ones that hurt.

God--she'd thought it was finally over.

_glowing embers, burning long and slow, deep within…_

She'd _burned,_ like never before, and thought--hoped, _desperately_--that it would be the first and the last time. But here she was, in someone's bed, still alive. Why? They must have saved her for _something._ There was always _something_. Maybe they'd use her up. Or maybe she could get past them, find a way to finally disappear. Sure. Max would find her before _that_ could happen.

_Max… He was going to be so mad_.

She had to be ready.

Lili forced her eyes open, her hand fisting in the pillow with the effort.

_Darkness. She couldn't see--_ No. Lili blinked. There was some light. Behind her. It was just--it was just night, and she was lying on her stomach in someone's bed, and…

And Cyclops rose from the chair, setting his book aside, coming to crouch at the side of the bed. "You're awake," he whispered, grinning hugely, and Lili blinked again, at the relief in his voice and his face. Why was that a good thing?

"It's all right, Liliana," he hastened to reassure her. "You were exhausted, but you're going to be fine. How do you feel?"

How did she _feel_? She wanted to be left alone--she wanted to be normal in a normal family in a normal home--she wanted to never burn again--she wanted to burn until there was nothing left of her--she wanted to scream--she wanted to sleep--why the hell did it matter _now_ how she _felt_--

A sudden, overwhelming, viciously painful thirst wracked her and scattered her panicked thoughts. Lili shifted her face on the pillow and tried to get the word out--_water_--but she couldn't be sure she'd even managed to move her mouth at all. She tried again, but Cyclops was already holding a glass and gently slipping a straw between her lips.

Cool, blessed _water_.

She sucked down as much as she could in one huge, greedy gulp, soothing that burning ache in her throat--and then she realized--need, she was letting him know she had a _need_--he'd use it against her-- Lili jerked her head back and let the straw drop from her mouth and closed her eyes. _Breathe,_ breathe, calm and even, _don't let him know._ A cough welled within her, and furiously she squelched it.

He stilled, and now she worked hard to keep the tears at bay, because that meant there was a glass of water still inches away from her face. But she just couldn't risk reaching for it. She _couldn't._

"Liliana, you're seriously dehydrated," he finally said, slowly. He sounded confused. "We've got you on IV's, but now that you're awake, could you drink a little more? Please?"

The gentle sincerity in that voice was definitely too good to be true. She kept her eyes closed.

She heard and felt him withdraw, but the glass clinked close by--a night table?--and he only went as far as the chair he'd been in before.

"My name is Scott Summers," he said, soft and low in the night. "And this is Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. You're safe here, and very welcome. The only things we want you to do are rest and get better, all right?"

Oh, _sure_.

"All of the students here have some kind of genetic mutation, like yours and mine, that gives them power," Scott continued.

He _had_ to be kidding. If there were others, Max would have grabbed every last one of them.

"You're not alone here. We'll help you through this. I know it must have been a shock when that much power came out of you--the first time it happened to me, I… "

He went on, but the words tumbled over her without meaning and fused into others as memory surged, raw and hot, of something shattering deep within and burning, burning, _burning_ without thought or care, and that awful moment of realization-- _There are people trapped in some of these buildings!_

People, _people,_ she'd put the fire out, but-- She had to ask. _She had to know_, no matter what it gave him to hold over her later.

Fatigue was tugging at her, her throat was tight and her head was whirling and all she wanted in the world was the rest of the water in that glass and the peace to take it, but Lili clenched her fingers and scraped what was left of her strength together and opened her eyes.

Cyclops paused. "What is it?" he asked, frowning, rising half out of the chair. "Are you in pain? Just let me get--"

The pain didn't matter. Lili shook her head and dragged a jagged breath across her aching throat and forced the words out past the terrible fear.

"_Did I hurt anyone?_"

He stepped quickly back to the bed. "Everyone is _fine_," he said firmly. "Just some smoke inhalation and minor burns. You were _fantastic_."

No she wasn't. But could she believe the rest? _Any_ of it? Oh, there was so much to figure out, so much to handle. Where was Max? _God, he was going to be so mad when he found her._ But everything had changed--what was going _on_? These _people_ were involved and what did they want from her? Was she really in a school? Were there really others like her? _Had she really not hurt anyone?_

What could she say to him, what could she risk--God, if only she could _think._

Questions pounding in her head, all Lili could do was lie there and look up at him, anxious and waiting for whatever he was going to do next, now that he knew she cared enough to ask if she'd hurt anyone.

He reached and she felt herself flinching and scrambled to control it--_but he was reaching for the glass_. Lili breathed carefully, relaxing a little from controlling her movement. Then he picked up the glass and sat carefully next to her on the bed and she froze.

They watched each other for a long moment. Lili wished with all her heart that she could see his eyes better. Her breath hitched in her throat--was _she_ giving anything away?

Finally he offered her the straw, holding it at her mouth as she hesitated.

Would it hurt, to take more water? He already knew she was thirsty. And he'd already seen her refuse it once. God, she couldn't read him and she just couldn't _think_.

"How about a deal?" he softly offered. "As much water as you want for as long as you're here, if you give me a chance to prove to you that I'm telling you the truth about this place and the people here."

Lili frowned. That was a very strange deal. But she'd certainly lived with far worse. She managed a whisper. "Just the chance?"

Cyclops nodded. "That's all I want, Liliana. The rest will be up to you. Whether you believe me or not, you're free to go as soon as you're able. You have my word."

_Far_ too good to be true. He'd let her walk free, just because she drank some water now and listened to his pitch later? It would never happen. There'd be a catch somewhere down the line. Probably the _as soon as she was able_ part. But she wanted that water, and she was too damned tired to care what it might cost her later. This might be the stupidest thing she'd ever done, but it just didn't matter any more. She couldn't think, she didn't know what was going on, and _she wanted that water._ "Deal," she said.

"Deal," he repeated, smiling, and gently returned the straw to her. "Drink up."

She drank, like she hadn't in years, thinking about nothing but the glorious experience of sipping that wonderfully cool, clear, fresh water until she'd drained the glass twice. Wordlessly Cyclops got up to refill the glass again, and Lili sighed in contentment and ran her tongue over her lips. It felt so good, not to be thirsty any more. Or maybe she was dreaming. The soft bed, those gentle touches, as much water as she wanted… It _had _to be a dream.

The bed dipped, startling a mumbled protest from her as she blinked--but when had her eyes closed? Oh, yes, she thought, as they drifted shut again. She'd been having the most lovely dream about water…

Another gentle touch, across her hair, convinced her. She was _definitely_ dreaming.

"Go back to sleep, Liliana." That beautiful voice again, from far away. "It's all right. You can have more water later. One of us will be here when you wake up."

It was so easy, to let go and drift back into the darkness, slipping from one dream to another. For once in her life, her throat felt cool. There was softness around her, and warmth next to her. There was a light touch in her hair, a gentle hand on her wrist--_she was dreaming about the gentle touches again_.

And in this dream, she hadn't hurt anyone.

She grabbed that rare moment of peace and held onto it with all that was left of her strength, taking it with her into sleep.

X Five

"I don't like this, Professor," Scott sighed, easily matching his pace to the Professor's as he wheeled down the hall to Liliana's room. "If Magneto starts stirring mutants up to make some kind of show of force, he could play right into Senator Kelly's agenda and get that act passed so fast even _your_ head would spin."

"Fear is a powerful motivator," Xavier mused. "The senator fears our abilities and intentions, Eric fears another Holocaust… and _I_ fear that I will never be able to get everyone to the same table to discuss these issues rationally."

"What do we do, if that's asking too much--if some fears are just too deeply ingrained?" Scott shrugged. "I mean, you could permanently screw my visor to my skull, and I'd still be afraid of losing control of my power. That fear will _always_ be a part of everything I do."

"The difference, Scott, is that you control both your fear and your power without inflicting your world views on anyone else. For Eric and the senator and those who follow them, however, their fears will never be assuaged without the other side's capitulation."

"Well, we know what the senator is up to--getting that bill passed. You and Jean have already lobbied as much as we dare, without risking exposing the school. That leaves Magneto."

The Professor frowned. "As soon as we've checked on Liliana, I'm going to use Cerebro to try to find Eric and gather whatever I can on his intentions. Be ready. If there's any way at all to intervene and head this war of his off…"

"You know Jean and Ororo and I are as prepared for this as we can be," Scott reassured him. "Everything here is running smoothly, and the jet's fueled and ready to go."

"Good. Now--tell me about our guest. You said she woke before dawn this morning? I wouldn't have expected her to wake so soon."

"It was only for a few minutes. She woke properly around one. Storm redressed the bandages and tried to help Liliana eat, but she was so obviously uncomfortable with Storm in the room that she felt it best to give her some privacy. Every time one of us checked on her after that this afternoon, she was either sleeping or _pretending_ she was sleeping. I don't think she believed anything either Storm or I told her."

Xavier smiled, and Scott paused as he did and turned to look outside, to watch the students scattered playing and studying across the lawn. "Most of them were every bit as wary as Liliana August when they first arrived--and with good reason. We just need to give her the same time and consideration as we give everyone. Perhaps even more. She'll come to understand who and what we are soon enough."

Absently Scott shoved his hands in his pockets and followed the Professor as he continued down the hall. "She was terrified that she'd hurt someone," he added.

"That bodes well for her character. I'm glad you were able to reassure her that she hadn't."

"Professor," Scott softly warned, "I think she's just plain terrified."

The Professor stopped at Liliana's door and swiveled his chair around to stare thoughtfully at the smooth, dark surface. "Sarkaroff," he finally murmured.

"Is that a guess?"

Xavier glanced up, his jaw tightening.

"I didn't think so," Scott scowled. Except that was no way to face a young woman already scared and possibly traumatized. He breathed deeply and forced himself to loosen up a little as he knocked. By the time Liliana's low, cautious voice called for them to enter and he opened the door and followed Xavier into her room, he'd managed to relax a bit.

He looked at the bed for her, but a movement to his right caught him by surprize and he stared, his jaw dropping, as Liliana uncurled her legs and rose carefully from the window seat. The clothes he knew Ororo had left in a drawer, but how had Liliana managed to get out of bed, much less dress herself? And where were the IV's?

"Good afternoon, Liliana August," the Professor said cheerfully. "I'm Charles Xavier. Welcome to my school. I do hope you're feeling better."

"Yes, thank you, Mr. Xavier. I am." Liliana hesitated, her sharp gaze flicking, assessing, between them. Scott saw countless questions in that gaze and an unwavering caution in the tension of her body. Which he just couldn't believe was dressed and out of bed and free of her IV's, when twelve hours ago she'd hadn't even been able to hold her own glass of water.

"Please," the Professor continued, smiling broadly," here I'm just 'the Professor,' or often 'Professor X.' I've never been much on formality."

She nodded, once, stiffly, her gaze straying to the hallway now visible through the door he'd left open.

"Are you well enough for a walk?" Scott cautiously offered. "We were just going to check in on you, maybe get you some dinner, but if you're feeling better you could eat with me and the students and I could give you a tour."

"A tour?" she repeated, her face blank, but had that been the barest hint of curiosity in her voice?

"Of the school," Scott added. "And the facilities."

"Will I be staying, then?" she asked, softly, and he watched in amazement as her face went even more closed than before.

"That's up to you, Liliana," the Professor replied evenly. "From now on, your life is your own. You can leave, or you can remain here. You can learn to control your power, or you can let it burn you alive. You have the same choices as every other man, woman, or child who comes into power, as every other mutant who finds their way to my door."

Liliana watched them, both, for a long, long moment. Scott watched her right back, hoping to find a clue to what she was thinking, but though her eyes burned with a fierce intelligence and strength, her face and posture betrayed nothing.

"Max will find me," she finally said, flatly.

"He has no idea where you are," Scott swore. "And even if he did, he doesn't matter anymore. He can't do anything to you ever again--unless you actually _want_ to go back to him?"

She almost laughed, a painful little sound that clutched at Scott's gut. "You're not listening. _Max will find me._ What I want--what you want--_we're_ the ones who don't matter."

_:I beg to differ,:_ the Professor said in Scott's mind.

Liliana gasped and stumbled back against the wall, and Scott realized the Professor had spoken to _her_ mind, as well. "How did you do that?" she choked, clearly struggling to get her breathing back under control.

"It's one of my abilities," the Professor calmly replied. _:The result of a mutation, just like your ability to control fire. Among other things, I can speak mind to mind.:_

She went impossibly pale. "You're in my head? _You know what I'm thinking?_"

That harsh whisper held a world of fear. Great. Now _they_ were scaring her. But the Professor stayed calm, just shaking his head.

"Just because I _can_ read a person's mind doesn't mean I _will_, Liliana," the Professor said firmly. "Your thoughts are you own."

She turned away, her hair falling in a dark, silky cascade to hide her face. "Why should I believe you?" she demanded, her voice low and raw.

"I don't particularly like when things are taken from me by force, and I certainly can't imagine doing it to others simply because I have a power that they don't," the Professor replied. "But that is something you will only believe if I prove it to you, and _that _will take some time. So, would you like to begin with that tour? Or would you rather rest longer?"

Slowly Liliana shook her head. "I don't know the rules here. I don't know what you want from me."

She sounded completely lost.

"Just give us the chance to show you what this place is," Scott coaxed. "That was our deal, and that's all we're asking. The rest is entirely up to you. You can do and be whatever you want now, just like the Profes--"

"I know what I am," she snapped, anger and despair echoing dully in her voice, and flicked her hand at the windows. An arc of air shimmered and crackled softly into flames. A heartbeat later the delicate tendrils of fire were gone, nothing but wisps of smoke that curled languidly in the air left behind to reassure his senses that anything had ever been there at all.

"Then do you know what you can be?" Scott had heard that extraordinary gentleness in the Professor's voice before--almost every time they found another mutant.

The silence stretched so long Scott wasn't sure she would answer. But he'd learned patience the hard way, and so had Charles Xavier. They waited.

"No," she finally whispered.

_Progress! Way to go, Professor,_ Scott thought.

"Then come," the Professor said, swiveling his chair around. "You may be surprized." Scott stepped out of the way and followed, smiling to himself when he heard footsteps behind them. A few strides later Liliana August walked, cautious and distant as ever, at his side.

X Six

The moment the door closed behind her Lili stumbled blindly, silently--_silently, so Max couldn't--_to the bed, holding on just long enough to sink down on the edge, the comforter thick and soft and cool beneath her. Her trembling and her nausea almost sent her to the floor anyway, but she clutched at the bed and closed her eyes and simply _breathed_, forcing her stomach to settle, willing the shaking to _go away,_ she didn't have the time to be _weak_, _she dare not let him see--_

_But he had._ Lili clenched her fists and bit her lip, almost drawing blood, but as hard as she'd tried he'd surely been able to see how weak she still was, from that horrible conflagration, _from the beating_. Why else would Scott cut "the tour" short?

Oh, but _nothing_ fit here--she didn't know what to think! Her door wasn't locked, her windows weren't barred, she could walk out any time--_if she could believe them, if she could believe what they said this place was._

They were lying--_they had to be!_ _Nothing _could be this good.

But she'd seen the children, _everywhere_, laughing and playing and studying, no fear in their voices, no tension in their gestures or their smiles… and no resentment or greedy speculation in their eyes when they'd looked at her. Just… sympathy, and curiosity, and even--more than once--friendship?

No, it was more than that. They'd looked at her like she was somehow… _family._ There was no mistaking those looks. She'd seen them too many times in the stands during her performances, before she'd learned not to look too closely at what she'd never have.

_Be quiet, little girl. I'm not your mother, you're mother is gone and will never come back. You belong to me now, and you always will. You do what I say and maybe today I will let you eat, so get in there and get back to work._

Max. He was all she knew, and she _knew _he'd find her. _So who was she kidding?_ She was losing it, hallucinating, wishing again for things that she'd learned long ago she would never have. Just because the rules were obviously different here--_food and water and soft clothes and warm beds and sunshine and fountains_--

_No. No!_ Lili forced herself to stand, to leave the comfort of the bed and stalk stiffly to the window. This place, these people--they _were not_ the answer to all those dreams she'd locked away. Just because they looked happy… People laughed and walked around at the circus all the time, _every single day_, and none of them had ever given a damn about her.

People. _Mutants._ Charles Xavier could read minds, if that hadn't been a carnival trick. These mutants _all_ had strength. They had _power_, real and terrifying, and they knew how to use it. She could see it, clear as day, in the way they moved, the way they looked at each other, even in the way they spoke.

_They could make her do whatever they wanted._

Just because they hadn't beaten her yet didn't mean they wouldn't. Just because they hadn't told her to do things she didn't want to do didn't mean they wouldn't hurt her if she said No! or Why? or Leave me alone.

Just because Max hadn't found her yet didn't mean he wasn't already on the way.

_OH--WHAT DID IT MATTER ANYWAY?_

Heat and pain and fear and fury all flared within her and twisted and she thrust them spiraling and arcing away from her, warping and blackening and cracking the glass and the wood and sweeping out to the lawn and the trees and _the children_ and horrified she sucked it all back--_inside, inside, back to her, down, down--_

--and sank to her knees, to her hands, to the floor, to curl into a ball, the trembling and the waves of nausea far beyond the last shreds of her control.

She heard the knock, but it was so far away, and if she didn't answer maybe they would let her be… _God, she was so tired, just let her be…_

But no. Of course not. Since when had God or anyone else ever listened to _her_? The door opened and Scott called her name and stepped into the room and Lili pressed her face to the cool wood beneath her cheek and let it all go. She was done caring about anything. _Let them do whatever they want._

The door closed but he hadn't left, he was rushing to her, she felt his presence beside her on the floor and didn't even try to brace herself against his touch. It just didn't matter anymore. _Let him do whatever he wants._

But his hands were so gentle, the concern in his voice so soft as he shifted her into his arms and cradled her against his chest, rocking her, slow and easy, over and over as the pain and the nausea wracked her and the warmth of his body crept into her. Mindlessly she curled into that warmth, needing his heat--_God_, there was so much _heat_ in him. It didn't even matter that he had his hands on her--they were so hot, like brands, but they didn't touch the welts on her back and they didn't burn, they _warmed _her and--and--_what_ was he saying?

"I'm so sorry, Liliana," he whispered, again, fiercely this time. He brushed her hair back from her face and she stilled, remembering that touch, remembering that beautiful voice. "I should have seen sooner how tired you are," he continued. "There's no hurry and there's nothing to be afraid of and there's absolutely no reason you should have pushed yourself like that. You don't need to do it all alone--not here, not anymore."

Again, that lovely smooth stroke of his fingers in her hair, and she let the last of her fears and her tension and even the shredded remains of the dreams she'd long since abandoned drift away with his touch. She didn't know the rules here, didn't know how to react to something that looked and sounded like an apology to _her_--which was ridiculous anyway--and she was just too damned tired to figure it out. Empty, exhausted, she lay still against him and waited, for whatever he would do or say next.

"Liliana?"

She almost said _yes_, was a heartbeat away from giving in. But something stirred in the depths of her soul and she realized, there was something after all. One thing that _did_ matter to her, whoever they were, whatever they wanted, whatever happened when Max found her. It had to be said, now.

"No matter what you do or say," she whispered hoarsely into his chest, "whether you're lying to me or not, I will _never_ burn one single living soul. Not for you, not for Max, not for _anyone_."

Tension crept into the arms that held her and tightened his fingers on her shoulder. "Is that what you were doing in that warehouse?" he asked, his voice as taut as his body. "Did Max ask you to burn someone?"

A man, a woman, nameless, terrified, shaking, the woman wailing when Gustav had ordered them burned, the man pleading with her to help them. As if she actually could. She had no idea what had happened to them. But at least _she _hadn't hurt them.

"Yes," she whispered.

Scott took a deep breath, relaxing a little against her as he let it slowly out. "Look at me, Liliana," he finally said.

There was no reason not to, no reason to fight the softly spoken order, so she blinked her tired, gritty eyes and tipped her head back. He was calm, serious, staring down at her from behind those red glasses as if there was no one and nothing more important in the entire world than her and what she'd just said to him.

"I believe you," he said, simply.

The words surprized her almost as much as his tone. No sarcasm, no insults, no anger or calculation or even the barest hint of a threat. If he was lying, he was really, _really _good at it.

"And I hope you believe me when I tell you," he continued, "that I can't imagine a single reason or situation bad enough that I would ever even _consider_ asking that of you."

_Well._ Was that honesty, in his low, smooth voice, in those clear eyes watching her so closely, in the steady strength that held her? Or did it all add up to the biggest lie of all? Would she ever even know the difference?

Or would Max get there before she figured it out?

"What is it?"

_Damn,_ he was sharp. Maybe even more observant than she was, and _that_ was saying something. He definitely saw more than Max did. But she didn't want to talk about Max. He'd be there soon enough, and then they'd see. Lili shook her head and took a deep breath, bracing herself to ease out of his arms and try, somehow, to get to her feet.

Scott actually loosened his hold, just a little, but it was enough to tell her she'd gone too far, done too much--if he let go of her, she'd go nowhere but the rest of the way back to the floor.

She'd have to ask for his help.

She'd owe him, and he'd mock her weakness now and take advantage of it later and--

"Maybe you'd better let me," Scott said, and Lili watched, dumbfounded, as he shifted and lifted her without another word. Somewhere, distantly, she realized her back hurt where his arm held her, but she was far too busy trying to take in the fact that he'd realized she couldn't do it as quickly as she had _and he hadn't made her beg for his help_.

Scott set her carefully down on the bed. "I brought you a couple of painkillers, if…"

Lili gritted her teeth and rolled slowly to her left side, blinking as the waves of pain pulsed through her, radiating from her back and scattering her thoughts and setting her to trembling again. "No," she said, the denial automatic, but he was already holding another glass of water and pressing the pills to her lips.

"They'll kick in in a couple of minutes," he promised softly as she swallowed.

Lili felt the bed dip a little as he sat and stared up at him. He was staying with her. What did he want? What would the price for this _kindness_ be?

"Jean did her best, Liliana," he hesitated, and now she braced herself, at his closeness and his tone and his worried frown. "But they will scar. She's just not sure how badly."

"Oh, no," she said. Was _that_ all? Could that really be _all_? "No, they won't."

An eyebrow rose above his glasses. "You have a healing power, too?"

_Hell._ She'd _given_ that away, hadn't she? Stupid, _stupid!_ She was exhausted and he seemed genuine and she'd actually let one miserable moment of apparent kindness knock down all her defenses and--_idiot!_

"No," she snapped.

_An arm, raised and swiftly, brutally descending. "Don't ever use that tone of--"_

"I'm sorry," she gasped, wincing away, pain flaring again, but he hadn't moved to strike her--this was Scott, not Max--_Scott_ had actually sat back-- "I'm sorry," she said again, blanking the pain as best she could and forcing herself to stillness, to calm, to control. _Think, Liliana. Think!_

She risked a quick glance. Scott Summers was equally still, watching her with that steady, patient, too-knowing gaze. But what caught and held her was the heat and the power within him, glowing brighter and hotter, crimson and glittering. He was angry.

No, he was _furious._

_What had she done?_

"It's just that I never scar," she stammered. She had to defuse that tightening coil of fury before it exploded all over her--but _how_? She didn't know him, didn't know his rules or his triggers or--

Scott looked away, his mouth thin and tense. The brightness of his power dimmed, just a little, the knot easing--he was struggling for control.

"It's something to do with the heat," she explained, the words tumbling from her, instinct taking over. _Keep talking_. _Tell him more_. "It burns everything away--scars, bruises, whatever. I'm never even sick for longer than a couple of hours. I'll be ready in a day or two, I promise. I won't even--"

The power flared, so hot she gasped, so bright she flinched and had to blink away tears. _Wrong words, wrong words, this was it, it was all over--_

"Ready for what?" he asked, his voice dangerously soft, one hand fisting where it rested on the bed between them.

His anger was even worse and more frightening than Max's, because this anger she could _see_, and she didn't know what he would do, didn't know what Scott wanted to hear. Helplessly she shrugged. "For whatever you want from me."

Scott nodded, but the tautness of his body didn't change. He looked down, blinking at the glass of water he still held in his other hand, and absently set it back on the night stand. But when he turned back to her, there was nothing absent about his gaze--there was more emotion there than she'd ever seen in anyone's eyes, far too much for her to read or even begin to understand. "You thought I was going to hit you, didn't you?"

Her breath caught in her throat. That didn't sound like anger in his voice--could that possibly be _pain_? Why would he be hurt? What _had_ she done? "It wasn't you," she hedged, trying to take it back, _whatever_ "it" was. "It was me. I'm sorry. Thank you for helping me and for the pills. And the water. Thank you."

"You thought I was going to hit you," he slowly, carefully repeated, "because Max hits you."

He wasn't asking a question this time, he was stating a fact. Only this fact was one that she'd lived with all her life, and one that she'd _never _talked to _anyone _about. As if anyone had ever cared to ask before this.

What to say? Her throat tightened. "Of course not," she managed.

Scott stared at her, so stern and so penetrating that she felt like her entire life was being stripped bare. It took every ounce of her control not to squirm like an infant under his scrutiny. Why was he looking at her like that? What did he see?

His fingertips skimmed the back of her hand and she started, her gaze dropping to watch, spellbound, as the weight of his hand settled warmly, gently, over hers. Why? What was he doing? She was shaking again, she realized. And she couldn't stop it. He must know. He hadto feel it.

"I will _never_ hit you." That beautiful voice, rough now with all that emotion, though his hand stayed gentle on hers. An ache started, somewhere deep in her chest.

"You have my word, _no one_ will hurt you here, _ever_."

The ache grew and sharpened and turned into that old, familiar longing. For a family, a home. If only she could believe him... _No. She'd never have those things. It was useless to even hope for them._ Except she was so tired, and try as she might she couldn't lock that dream back up again. _Damn him, damn this place, for dragging it all back out of her._

"I know you think we want something from you, that we're like Max, that this place is a prison just like all those circuses must have always been, but that's _just not true_. You can leave whenever you want, do whatever you want, go wherever you want. Even if--" He paused, and his fingers tightened the barest bit against hers. "Even if what you want is to go back to Max, although I can't promise I won't do everything in my power to talk you out of _that._ But Liliana, what I _can _promise you is that we don't want or need anything from you at all."

She didn't dare believe him. Lili pulled her hand from beneath his. "You came for me, and you brought me here." The words came out like an accusation, but this time, she didn't have any apologies in her. She just wanted the games to stop. She was so damned tired.

Scott took a deep breath and, oddly, relaxed all the way. "It's not exactly common knowledge that all the students here have some kind of genetic mutation, so very few actually just walk up and knock on the door. In fact, most of the kids were runaways. We're constantly scanning the news and police reports and anything else we can get our hands on to find the ones who need this place."

"Need? Why would anyone _need_ this place?"

"It's a safe haven, a school where kids can be free to learn math and history and science just like everyone else, but where mutants can learn to handle their powers without worrying about being called a _freak_--or worse. Liliana, some of the kids here haven't even told their _parents _of their powers. Others came from situations just as bad as yours. But here, they can all relax and just be themselves."

Others. She'd never considered there might be others. Max had said she was the only one, worthless to all but him--that no one else would ever want her or accept her _demonic_ ability. Not even the other circus performers had known what she really was. But then… "How did you find _me_?"

"One of the Professor's contacts went to the show and realized what you were doing. But when he tried to talk to you afterwards, they threw him out--literally. He was pretty banged up. That's when he called us."

"What did he want?" Lili pressed. "What do _you_ want?"

"Just to make sure you're all right," Scott said.

_That she was all right?_ She raised her head, speechless, to stare at him. He'd said that before, too, but…

"Is it that hard to believe?" he softly asked.

_Yes._ She couldn't get the word out, but he saw her answer as if she'd shouted it.

"We couldn't find any records on you, Liliana August--your birth certificate and social security number were fake, your school records were practically nonexistent. All I could tell for sure was that you moved from circus to circus, that the new one was always larger as your powers and your popularity grew, and that Sarkaroff always went with you. That plus the way they treated Paul made us suspicious, that maybe you were stuck in a bad situation and didn't know how to get out. So we came to check on you. It's part of what we do here--look out for the ones who are like us and who can't do it on their own. If you'd told us you were happy and Max had provided us with some kind of plausible story, we wouldn't have taken you anywhere at all. But when we found you, you were standing in the middle of a four-alarm fire. And when you collapsed at our feet, that was pretty much all we needed to clinch the idea that you needed our help."

_Help._ They'd helped her. They'd come to find her _before_ that awful conflagration had burst out of her, and even after they'd seen the damage she could do, they'd brought her to this place and they'd _helped_ her. She didn't know, yet, what the price of that help would be. But she was beginning to wonder if--whatever it was--she might not be willing to pay it. It seemed to be so much nicer here than at the circus… and Scott did _not_ like Max, if she was any judge of people at all.

_God, was it truly possible, to have a life--any life--that didn't include Max?_

"Liliana," Scott said, drawing her scattered attention back to him.

"Lili," she blurted. _Stupid--_why give him even that much of her? But he paused, and the smile that flitted across his face made the ache in her chest grow until her breath caught in her throat.

"Lili," he softly repeated. "I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Can you tell me what happened in Manhattan?"

_Max, more brutal than he'd ever been. Pain like she'd never felt before, and a terrible fear that this time, Max would kill her. Then fury, and fire, and a burning desire for it all to be over._ Shame rose bitter in her mouth, revulsion roiling in her gut, and Lili closed her eyes and turned her face into the pillow, breathing carefully against the memories lancing hotly through her.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." His words came from far away, from the other side of the fire, smoky and soft. Somehow it made her feel better, with the flames between them, holding him distant and yet drawing him close at the same time, as if--for once--she was safe and secluded within her heat… and his. Was this it, the price for his help? Telling him what had happened? She opened her mouth--easy enough, to pay this much--but the words that came out of her weren't what she'd intended.

"I only remember my mother a little," she began, blinking at the memories of dark hair and brown eyes, knowing he was listening and oddly finding comfort in that. "What I remember is a lot of doctors' offices. Everyone felt cool to me, and I must have felt hot to them. So I guess this heat has always been inside me. The first time it came out I was five, or maybe six. I was at the circus--I don't remember who'd brought me--and I'd gotten lost. All I wanted was my mother. I was so afraid…"

The memory rushed through her, the clearest memory of her entire childhood one of wretched fear and startling, burning _heat_, and she clenched her fists against the shudder that wracked her. Scott's hand folded around her fist, heat embracing heat, and Lili's breath left her in a jerky sigh as the support in that simple gesture chased the worst of the fear back to the past.

"It wasn't much," she finally continued, swallowing hard, "just a wooden sign suddenly burning, but I guess the wrong person saw it. After that there was only Max. Just Max… and everything he made me do. Day after day after day, just Max. Except every once in a while, he'd take me to Gustav. Then I'd have to make something burn. But Gustav… he finally asked me to burn…"

"People," Scott finished for her, squeezing her hand beneath his. Lili nodded, and pressed her eyes closed even tighter, but nothing could take those memories away. "And you said no. Is that what happened in Manhattan?"

"I'd never refused him before," she whispered, wincing and recoiling as if Max stood before her with his belt raised once more. "He was so mad he couldn't speak, he just--" _He'd snarled like an animal and lunged and grabbed and the belt had whistled through the air and cracked across her skin, over and over._ Lili shuddered, gasping, her arm and her back throbbing with the memory.

"I know, Lili," Scott said, his hand tight around hers, tension in his voice, as well. "It's all right now. You're safe here. Max can't--"

_Max._

"I _hate _him," she spat, anger rising hot and red in her eyes and crackling in her ears. "I thought he was going to finally kill me and it was all so _unfair_ and he wouldn't stop and that was all I wanted, I swear, just for him to stop, but he hit me again and they _laughed _and I got so _mad_ and something just _broke_ and _everything was burning_--"

It was all there--the _heat_--roiling and crackling and climbing higher and demanding to be released. Scott gasped and she _reached_ for the flames, grabbing them and holding on--_Scott, all those kids, they'd done nothing_--for moments, for _hours_, with every last ounce of control she had, to contain her fury, to keep the fires raging _only_ within her, to calm herself and coax the fire back down little by little to the relative safety of embers--still hot, still dangerous, ready to ignite with a breath, but banked, quiet, _quiet_.

When she could finally hear again, it was Scott's voice that rose above the lowering flames, murmuring ceaselessly that she wasn't alone and he knew she could do this. Over and over a cool cloth brushed across her forehead, her cheek, her neck. _Scott_, soothing, gentle, _there_, despite the danger, _helping_ her, the sympathy and the pain in his voice like nothing she'd ever heard before in her life.

Why? Why had he stayed? _Why_, when all he'd had to do to be safe was _walk away and let her burn_…

"Lili? Are you all right?"

She would have laughed, if she'd had the strength for it. Max had never asked her that--_never_--but Scott did, every time he was with her.

"Lili, can you hear me?"

She should answer him. He deserved at least that. She tried, but she was so tired, and nothing came out of her mouth. Again that cool cloth whisked across her cheek, so this time she tried to nod, hoping he would feel it, and was unaccountably cheered when he sighed in relief and she felt his cool, damp fingertips settle lightly at her wrist.

"Tell me what you need. What can I do?"

All she _needed _was to sleep, and to eat and drink again when she woke, and then probably more of the same for another two or three days, but that wasn't all she _wanted._

She wanted to feel safe. She _wanted_ to believe. In this place. In him. In a life where people helped, just because. Where someone stayed near her when she struggled for control, _where Max couldn't hurt her_. But that was too much to ask, that was such a dangerous thought--she'd have to let go of too much to even begin to believe in it. But… what if all she wanted, just this one time, in this completely unexpected place with this man who said such lovely things and made her dream again, was one little thing. One little moment, when she didn't have to be alone. He hadn't left her before--either time--when there'd been danger. When she'd _needed _him. Would he stay, this one time, just because she asked?

She tried to look at him, tried to see if he understood, but her vision was still full of the flames and she wasn't even sure her eyes were open. Instead she fumbled for Scott's hand, her own heavy and uncooperative, but she couldn't find him and her heart plummeted, the taste of ashes rising in her mouth. _She was so tired of being alone._ But then his hand was there, warm and steady, his strong fingers twining through her trembling ones, and those cool, soft strokes across her face and neck resumed.

"It's all right, Lili. You're not alone here."

She sighed, amazed, and for the first time in years, she gave herself a moment to hope. She locked it away, deep within, and was nearly asleep when a knock on the door startled her back awake.

"Come in," Scott called, setting aside a basin of water and a washcloth as he stood.

"The Professor has a lead on what Magneto's up to--or at least, who he's after. We're up." Storm. Her back was to the door, but Lili knew she'd never forget Storm's voice.

Scott nodded and leaned over her. "Lili, I've got to go. Is it all right if I have Jean check in on you while Storm and I are gone?"

He was leaving. She'd known he would, been prepared for it, expected it, yet there she lay, no idea what she thought about it, no clue how to feel or behave or react or--

"I don't think we'll be long," he added, gently.

_Oh, he read her far, far too easily_. Lili cleared her throat. "I'll be fine now. But thank you--for before."

She hadn't fooled him, not even a little bit, but whatever was going on was important--and urgent. Scott wasn't satisfied with her answer, but he didn't have the time to stick around and talk to her about it. He pressed his hand over hers once more, and then she heard the sound of the door closing behind him and Storm, and he was gone.

Now what?

_She had no idea._

X Seven

Scott woke as he always did, quickly, cleanly, his eyes tightly closed.

"Good morning," Jean said, shifting to curl up next to him, her voice still soft and husky with sleep. Her head settled warmly on his shoulder, and Scott sighed with contentment. Whatever the day would bring, even if Magneto did stir up a war, starting it quietly like this with Jean was perfect. He checked that his visor was in place with a few swift, precise touches and finally opened his eyes and turned to stare down at her.

"It certainly is," he smiled, brushing her sleep-snarled hair back from her face. She was so beautiful. How he wished he could see her in real light and true colors, and not just in the same, never-changing shades of _red_. "When did you finally come to bed?"

"Not too much later than you," she reassured him, her eyes still closed. "I treated Logan's injuries and made sure he was stable and then left him to rest. You were already sound asleep, though. I thought you were going to talk to Liliana for a while."

"She closed up on me again. I think Lili was doubting herself for telling me as much as she had, like she can't trust me or this place yet."

Jean blinked at him, her eyebrows raised. "Lili?"

"She told me to call her that earlier. I thought I'd broken through, that it meant she was at least starting to let me in, but now I'm not so sure."

"Give her some time," Jean softly urged. "Her life with Sarkaroff must have taught her a lot of defensive mechanisms, and she's not going to just drop them all in a day. We have to prove ourselves to her first."

"I know. Ororo put Rogue in the room across the hall from Lili, so maybe the two of them will be able to help each other adjust."

"That was smart," Jean approved, her gaze dropping to his mouth. She arched sinuously against him and nuzzled his neck, the heat of her need rushing swiftly over him with the sudden, surging current of her thoughts in his mind.

"Very," he gasped, pulling her more tightly to him, desire arcing high and hard and fast to meet the pulsing demands in his head and the clever hands stroking his body. "Storm's wonderful with the kids."

"And I'm great in the lab," she murmured, her hand drifting to the hem of his t-shirt. "And you're a fantastic leader in the field." Jean sat up, pulling him with her, yanking his t-shirt over his head.

"We're quite a team," he grinned, and made quick work of removing her nightgown. He threw it aside and pressed her back down to the bed beneath him, settling between her legs and suckling hungrily at her breast as she arched hard into him.

"The best," she moaned, her head thrown back, her neck exposed, her mind wrapping his in a chaos of hot, aching hunger, and he couldn't resist sliding up across her and kissing that smooth expanse of skin.

Her hands raked down his back and pushed at his pajamas and his mind splintered when her fingers closed round him. "The best what?" he shuddered as she stroked him. He didn't wait, couldn't hold back, thrusting sure and deep into her wet, welcoming heat.

"_Everything_," she moaned, clinging to him, writhing beneath him.

_Everything_, he agreed, and lost himself in her, mind and body and soul. _Perfect._

X Eight

Lili hated waiting, but just like a lot of other things she hated, like a lot of other things life with Max had taught her, she did it very, very well. So she sat on the edge of the bed, still and silent, and simply stared at the clock on the night stand. It was a beautiful clock, old, its black hands intricately scrolled, and by the time those hands finally settled at eleven o'clock she'd memorized every inch of the thing.

It was time. She could leave now. Slowly Lili turned to face the door. Smooth, dark golden wood, with a glass door knob. Closed, but not locked. _Not locked._ She could go. They started serving lunch in the cafeteria at eleven. All she had to do was get up, open the door, and find her way back to the cafeteria. Her eyes strayed across the desk to the pack of papers Ororo had left with her, but there wasn't anything there she hadn't already memorized, including the map of the school and grounds. She knew exactly how to get to the cafeteria. All she had to do now… was get up.

Her hands were sweating. Lili smoothed them down her new jeans and closed her eyes. _How ridiculous._ She'd lived her entire life with locked doors that she _couldn't_ open. Now she sat there facing one that she could open just as easily as she could burn it to cinders, and she was actually _afraid_ of leaving the damned room.

She heard other doors opening, footsteps and talking in the hall as classes let out and the students of Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters went about their days. _Gifted._ Lili didn't feel _gifted_. And whatever her actual age, she definitely didn't feel young. But she was hungry. And thirsty. Whatever this place actually was, she wasn't breaking any of its rules if she went and had lunch now. Lili opened her eyes and raised her head and stared the door down as she rose. Three steps, four, and she was reaching for the door knob. A touch, a twist of her wrist… and the door swung easily open.

Ororo was there in the hall, hand raised to knock. "Hey," she said softly, smiling, and Lili would have bet her life that that was _approval_ shining in Ororo's dark eyes.

Lili smiled tentatively back. "I was just going to lunch," she explained, just in case she was wrong about the rules.

"So were we. Liliana, I'd like you to meet Rogue. She arrived last night. Rogue, Liliana has only been here a few days longer than you."

The girl with Ororo was young, pretty, and Lili read a nervous uncertainty in the shifting feet, quick smile, and even quicker wave she offered. Lili had no idea what to do or say. Rogue, though, did.

"You hungry?" she asked, stepping back and cocking her head in the direction of the cafeteria. "The food's pretty good here--at least, breakfast was."

"Starving," Lili admitted, and screwing up every ounce of courage she could muster, she walked through the doorway and quietly shut the door behind her.

She felt like she'd just conquered the world.

_:Liliana, Rogue, please excuse me, but I need to take Storm from you. Storm? Could you join us in the ready room, please?:_

Eyes wide, frozen in place, Lili could only stare at Ororo.

"I'm on my way, Professor," Ororo calmly said to thin air. "You two go on ahead."

Lili didn't move. And Rogue looked every bit as stunned as Lili felt.

Laughingly Ororo pushed at them both. "You'll get used to it, I promise. Now go have lunch. Liliana, if you'd like, stay with Rogue when she goes back to class and I'll find you later to talk to you about what kind of classes you'd like to take. All right?"

She didn't wait for an answer, which was good, because Lili didn't have one for her. With an easy wave Ororo was gone, strolling swiftly away.

"Wow," Rogue breathed. "These people are really something."

"I know." Lili tore her gaze away from Ororo's retreating back to find Rogue staring pensively at her gloved hands. She started slowly toward the cafeteria, and just as slowly Lili followed. It seemed she wasn't the only one with a lot to think about. They were nearly there when Rogue abruptly stopped and looked at Lili.

"You think they're for real here?"

She was serious--about the question as well as actually wanting to know what Lili thought. Lili shrugged and gave her the only answer she had. "They seem to be--so far."

Rogue nodded, then turned as something behind Lili caught her eye. And blushed. Make that _someone_.

"Hey," Rogue offered that little wave and little smile again, but Lili didn't miss the steps back. Either Rogue didn't want people in her space, or she didn't like being touched. The signs were too clear. And too close to home.

"Hey," came a young, clear voice, and Lili suddenly found herself standing in the middle of a small group of students. "I'm Bobby," the fairer guy continued. "Iceman. You must be the other new recruit, Liliana. This is Kitty--"

"I walk through walls," Kitty calmly announced.

"--Peter--" Bobby continued.

"Colossus," the massive young man said. _That accent._ Lili sucked in a startled breath, then just as quickly made herself relax. Not every Russian so much as knew Max, much less worked for him.

"--and John," Bobby finished.

"Pyro," John said, and in that one word Lili heard arrogance and impatience. And then _meaning_ sank in.

"Pyro?" she gaped. _Someone else with this fire inside them?_

He grinned, a twist of his lips that she didn't like at all, and produced a lighter from his pocket. Lili _watched_ as he flicked the lighter and transferred the flame to his hand, where it danced along his fingers, apparently at his bidding. Until _Iceman_ blew the flame out with a breath so cold it sent chills down Lili's spine.

Lili swallowed, hard, head spinning as it hit her--there really were _others_, here at the school and out there in the world, too. _Mutants_, like _her_, with powers. There might even be someone out there _exactly_ like her--but Pyro wasn't it. Whatever his ability to see and manipulate fire, she just couldn't see it inside him. Which was both disappointing and--because it was him--a relief.

"Welcome to Mutant High," Bobby grinned.

"Thank you," Lili managed.

John flicked his lighter, then just as quickly snapped it closed. A nervous habit. "So what can _you_ do?" _Snick. Click. Snick--_

Lili _reached_, calling the flame of his lighter to _her_ hand, feeding it and shaping it into an intricate, whirling spiral pattern. Then she opened her other hand and called up the heat within her and set the air alight in a mirror image to the first. Before Bobby could blow them out, though, she closed her hands and pulled both tiny fires back into her.

It only took a moment to blink the flames from her eyes, but when she looked at the students again, they'd all given her a little bit more room. And Pyro wasn't flicking his lighter any more.

"Neat," Rogue grinned, with a sly glance at John. "Come on--I smell fried chicken."

In some ways it was the longest half hour of her life, eating lunch with five people she'd never met before _who'd never met Max_. She didn't know what to do, had no idea how to behave in this brand new world where Max's rules didn't seem to matter, so she watched them, all, like she'd learned to do a _very_ long time ago. She listened to every word, caught every nuance of tone and inflection, easily read every gesture.

And discovered that they were _nice_. Well, she'd have to watch John, but even he relaxed as the meal went on. Bobby, Kitty, Peter, John, Rogue, whatever their powers, they were still… _real. Just like her. _She hadn't questioned her sudden need to establish herself as one of them, but now Lili paused and considered before she said or did anything. She wanted them to like her, she realized. But she didn't want them to know anything about her life with Max. That was all easily sidestepped, though. By the end of the meal she was actually beginning to believe that she might stay. She couldn't help herself. She didn't even want to.

But then she realized that Scott and the Professor and a third man she didn't know were approaching their table… approaching _her_. She went numb.

_They wanted something. What? What would they ask of her--or would they try force? Could she do it? Or would the price to stay here be too high after all?_

Bobby leaned over, blocking her view. "You all right?" he asked softly. The others, she realized, were gathering up their things and getting ready to leave.

Lili had to clear her throat. "I'm still learning the rules here."

Bobby glanced back at the men. "Don't worry. Professor X, Scott, all of the teachers here--they're the best. We're really lucky to be here."

Lili managed a small smile in thanks as her new… could she--dare she--call them _friends_ already… scattered to get to their next classes. When she stood to meet the three men, she stood alone. It was almost a relief--she knew she could do _alone._

"Hello, Liliana," the Professor smiled. "This is Logan, also new to the school. Logan, Liliana is a very powerful elemental, a fire starter. One of the things we do here is test our newcomers' capabilities, so we can best teach them whatever they need to know to control their powers. So, Liliana, do you have some time for me this afternoon?"

He knew very well she had absolutely no idea what she was doing one minute to the next in this place. But Charles Xavier didn't sound like he was baiting her. He just sounded… _polite_. As for being tested… What if she lost control again, like she had in New York? The thought was, quite simply, more terrifying than anything else she could think of. Could they really teach her here to keep that from happening?

She wanted--_needed, now_--to know if this place was for real. If she wanted answers… Max had been her entire world for most of her life. But in this place, all roads clearly went through the Professor.

She didn't need any more time to consider. "Of course, Professor. As much time as you need."

X Nine

Scott sat back with the Professor and Logan, watching through the observation window as Jean put the last few leads on Lili. She was too thin, but a second full night of rest had apparently restored her strength. Like she'd said, she didn't have a single scar to show for her ordeal.

"A fire starter, huh?" Logan grunted. "This ought to be good."

Scott ignored him. They may need to protect _Wolverine_ to keep Magneto from using him, but that didn't mean Scott had to like him. He was rude, abrasive, ungrateful, and so fierce a loner that Scott sincerely doubted the word _team_ was even in his vocabulary. Not to mention the way he looked at Jean set Scott's teeth on edge. The best he could hope for was to minimize whatever disruptions Logan might cause while he was here. Including--especially--to someone as scared and emotionally fragile as Lili.

He'd watched her in the cafeteria, relaxed with the other students, then tense with them. He hadn't actually expected her to agree so readily to being tested. She obviously didn't trust them yet. She was waiting, watching _everything_, trying to learn their "rules" and biding her time, probably still thinking Max would show up at any moment to take her away… and probably still expecting that at any moment, they'd pull the rug out from under her and start making demands. He just had to hope that she was still giving them--giving him--the chance to show her what the School really was. Now all he had to do was figure out how to do that…

Ororo toggled the last few switches and leaned into the microphone. "We're all set here, Jean."

Jean nodded, squeezing Lili's shoulder, and came through to the control room. Behind her the massive door to the lab swung shut and sealed as she took her seat.

"Ready, Liliana?" Jean called.

Lili took a deep breath, absently smoothing the heat-resistant pants the Professor had made her wear, and adjusted her microphone. "I'm ready." She gestured at the dozens of different substances the Professor and Jean had scattered all over the lab. "What do you want me to burn first?"

Xavier toggled his own mike. "What burns the easiest, Liliana?"

"Air," she said, and without a single gesture or even a twitch, a sphere of flame simply erupted in the middle of the lab. She held the fire as they watched, the sensors on her body sending streams of data to Jean's console, the sensors in the lab sending more to Ororo's. "Any gas, really," she continued. Abruptly the sphere morphed into a dazzling, intricate pattern of exes. "It's also the easiest to control. Most of my act was based on just this."

Xavier smiled. "All right, let's try liquids next. Start with beaker number one."

Flammable liquids, usually inflammable liquids, small solids of various densities and compositions--methodically the Professor worked her through them all, while the data poured in.

Liliana burned _everything_, her control so precise she could raise or lower the temperature of an object, on cue, degree by degree. Scott was amazed. But he cheerfully had to kick Logan awake twice.

An hour into it the Professor asked if Lili needed a break. She stared up at him as if he'd asked if she needed a _match_. "Ten shows a week during the season, Professor, and three hours of rehearsal a day, every day, for as long as I can remember." Her glance flicked to Scott's. "I'll tell you when I start to get tired."

Scott smiled at her. And felt the knot is his belly unwind a little when she actually gave him a small nod in return.

They did take a break, an hour after that, to get rid of the debris and ashes and move the larger objects into the lab. To burn most of them would now require temperatures beyond what Lili knew she could control--which he strongly suspected was the reason she'd agreed to this--and Scott could see she was doing her best not to tense up. He rolled the last piece into place and walked over to her.

"Lili?" Scott prompted gently, waiting while she turned her focus outward to finally look at him.

"Don't let me hurt anyone," she said flatly. Color was impossible for him to distinguish anymore, but he looked into her eyes and knew they were no longer _any_ color at all. Because he knew they _burned._

"I know we're three stories below the school," she continued, her voice echoing hollowly, as if she was speaking to him over the rushing of flames. "I know this facility could dump thousands of gallons of water on me. I know Storm can and will bring a monsoon down on top of my head if that isn't enough."

Lili paused, her face going blank as her awareness turned inward again. "But I also know that at some point in New York I _became_ the fire. And when that happened I burned with it and would have kept on burning if Storm's little tidal wave hadn't shocked me out of it. So whatever happens, just… _please_, don't let me hurt anyone."

Scott could _feel_ the fire already building in her, dry and crackling in the air around her, but he reached to put his hands on her arms anyway, firm and reassuring, knowing she wouldn't hurt him--and gasped, _touching_ the inferno in her and _feeling an answering blaze within himself._

The power that curled and coiled and writhed ceaselessly within him _ignited_, rising up and howling in his head and beating at him to be released--_but he wasn't wearing his visor, just the damned glasses, he couldn't control the overflow!--_and he slammed his eyes shut and ripped his hands from Lili and stumbled away from her. But this wasn't just _power_ it was a _conflagration_ in him, searing and snarling and scorching and _he couldn't keep his eyes closed much longer._

Scott dropped to his knees and tore the glasses away and pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes and his face into the floor, but that wouldn't hold--_that wouldn't last_--_he didn't know how to put this inferno out_--he'd punch a hole miles deep into the earth and everything would be destroyed and all he could do was hold on and hope they got out before--

He screamed--_Get out!--I can't control this!_--but he couldn't hear himself over the _FLAMES_._ They crackled and roared and hissed in his ears, danced ruby red in his brain, filled him and consumed him and--_

_And she was there, burning with him, HEAT wrapping around his HEAT, seductive and sensuous, scorching FLAMES that sizzled and twisted and enticed and he was lost in their dancing, shimmering beauty, touching him, stroking him, consuming him, but she PULLED, drawing that engulfing HEAT away, sending those glittering, writhing FLAMES far--far--and away, away_--

_The blaze listened to her, went as she bid, sullenly loosing its grip on him, and he fought, for control--CONTROL--CONTROL-- Power howled and snapped and reached, for hours--days--years, ebbing a little more every time she pulled, and he fought forward, inch by hard-won inch. He didn't know how long they burned together, but the flames finally lowered, then dimmed, until with a few last, hungry licks at him they flickered out_ and he lay exhausted and soaked and trembling on the floor, the back of his head pressed against someone's knees, hands impossibly clamped across his and bravely helping to hold his eyes shut.

"Scott?" Lili gasped.

"My visor," he panted, coughing with the harsh, acrid smoke. "Please--" Because he didn't want to pass out but he couldn't make the floor stop dipping and spinning and what if he couldn't hold on--

"Please!" she repeated, shouting, and he heard the massive safety doors release and a static of words swirled around him and Jean was there, her hands sliding his visor on with precise, careful movements and pushing his shaking fingers away. The visor fit snugly, safely into place and Scott finally let go, drifting in aimless circles with the floor and more words tumbling over him and more hands, lifting him, carrying him--Logan? Where--what--

_:It's all right, Scott. Just relax. You're safe now.:_

Xavier, Jean, his visor… safety… _control_… Scott let himself fall into soft darkness.

Cold woke him, and a pounding headache, and it dawned on him that it was much quieter. Scott clutched at the table beneath him and shifted his head, trying to ease the drumming his brain was taking, and felt the reassuring pressure of his visor. Sighing with relief, he opened his eyes to find Jean leaning anxiously over him.

"Jean?" He could have sworn he'd spoken normally, but her name came out on a thin thread of sound.

"I'm here, Scott." She squeezed his hand, and her touch in his hair was steady, but even through the headache he could hear the tremor in her voice. "How do you feel?"

He had a maniac beating away in his brain and there had to be thousand-pound weights holding him down, but he was still in one piece. Was the lab? _Was Lili?_ "I'll live. But--_what happened_, Jean?"

"Lili senses your power as heat," Jean said, slowly, and Scott nodded that he was following her so far. "When you touched her she was already calling up her own heat--'burning,' to use her term. She said Max touched her all the time in practice, and you did last night, and nothing happened any of those times. But as near as she can tell, _this_ time your power _ignited_ and fed into hers. The Professor thinks it might have something to do with how much stronger she's become, since New York. Anyway, it was close, but she managed to expend enough of your combined powers for you to come out of it."

"How did she do that?" he gaped at her.

Jean smiled grimly. "She had us set off the sprinklers, but when that didn't help she sat there with you in that downpour and bled the power off herself. She incinerated every last boulder, block, and sphere you and Logan had just brought into the lab and would have started on the lab doors if you hadn't regained some sense of control when you did."

Scott closed his eyes, trying to take it all in--_Lili had helped him control his power?!_--but he couldn't think about all the staggering implications through the pounding in his head. He put it away, to worry about later. "Is Lili all right?"

"She's fine," Jean soothed, stroking his hair again. "She managed to stay conscious, but otherwise she's in about the same shape as you. She said most of the power she used was yours, but the control was hers, and that was every bit as draining."

"It was so wild, Jean," he whispered, the shock of it reverberating through him again. "_Burning_--so terribly _wild_ and so completely out of my control. I couldn't hear or see anything but the flames, mine and hers, _burning_…"

"Get some rest, Scott," Jean soothed. "We'll talk about this again when you and Lili are back on your feet."

He wanted to sleep, desperately, but there was an odd note in her voice. He tried to ask her what was wrong, except he couldn't get the words out. He could feel her easing into his mind, her touch gentle and light and loving and cool, soothing his headache and urging him towards sleep. But memories of dancing, glittering flames flashed behind his closed eyes and swept over him and carried him back down into darkness.

X Ten

Lili curled her legs under her and leaned back into the corner of the window seat, another glass of cold water in her hands. Outside it was dark, and quiet, a great unknown to her, but inside was a different story. Behind the walls of the Professor's school, she _thought_ she was beginning to see.

Lights blazed in the hallway, shining through the door she'd deliberately left open, noise spilling in as well. For a moment there was stillness, until three boys raced down the hall, flushed and laughing, earning exasperated looks from the pair of girls heading the other way. For a moment the noise ebbed, until music swelled in the common room. The movie over, the hall filled again with faces, movement, conversation. Some looked in, some smiled in passing, some waved, and some even had a word or two for her. It had been like that ever since she'd woken up late that afternoon and decided to open her door and leave it that way. She'd simply had to sit there, listen, and watch.

She'd learned a great deal. And most of it terrified her.

She'd spent her entire life practicing and performing, had known for years _exactly _what Max had expected her to do. Here there were no show times, just classes. _So what was she supposed to do with herself?_ Storm had mentioned that she could take classes, too, but Lili didn't even have the first clue what else she _could_ do, besides start fires. On the other hand, did it really matter? As long as she never saw Max or another circus...

Max. He'd rationed her food, made her beg for water until she'd stopped asking for anything, only taking whatever he gave her whenever he threw it at her. Here they ate and drank whatever they wanted. She was already thinking about breakfast and wondering how often they served chocolate peanut butter ice cream. _But what if, one day, Max or someone like him took it all away?_ She _knew_ how to live without… but what would she be willing to do to make sure she didn't ever have to live like that again?

She'd been alone most of her life, whether sitting next to Max or performing in front of thousands. She knew, intimately, how to be alone. Here, in one afternoon--one meal--she'd… she'd actually met people who might one day be her friends. _But what if she said or did the wrong thing?_ What if she insulted someone, or hurt them? Would they leave her? Would they _hurt_ her?

This place could be _exactly_ the safe haven and center of learning that Scott had said it was. _But what if it wasn't?_ How could she possibly handle the disappointment? Even worse, _what if it was_, _and Max found her there?_ Who else would he hurt--or take? _How much danger had she brought to this school and these kids?_

Or was _she_ the danger to them? After all, she'd already come perilously close to burning Scott and their lab and quite possibly the entire school and everyone in it to cinders.

She was shaking again.

Lili set her water aside, wrapping her arms around herself as she turned to stare at the darkness outside her window. Scott's afternoon classes had been cancelled. They'd said he was fine, that he was still in the lab only because nothing like that had ever happened to him and Jean wanted to be cautious. Max would have beaten her to a pulp after an accident like that. But the Professor hadn't even _looked_ harshly at her. They'd actually carried her to bed and dried her off and tucked her in and given her more water and let her rest, in the exact same bedroom as before, right smack in the middle of all those students. As if her power wasn't a danger to any of them. As if… As if she could be _trusted_ not to hurt them.

If they were playing her, they were very, _very _good at it. So good, in fact, that she was perilously close to admitting that she wouldn't mind playing along at all.

Lili sighed. The truth was, she didn't know _what _to believe any more. All she could really say for certain was that the rules that she'd learned so far at this school were infinitely better than the ones Max had beaten into her at the circus. Maybe, if she didn't allow herself to hope for too much more--to give them the power to disappoint her, to hurt her--then maybe she'd be all right.

She had to know if she could do this, if she could adjust. And she had to know if they'd let her. It was time, then, to put everything to the test.

Things had finally quieted down, and Lili was grateful for the empty halls as she made her way to the elevator. Now that she was actually on her feet and doing this, she didn't really want to have to stop to explain herself to anyone. Miraculously, she made it all the way to the medical lab without running into anyone. Even more amazing, Scott was still there, _and _alone. She didn't want to have this conversation with anyone but him.

He had his back to her. In the moments it took him to shrug a sweater on over his shirt, Lili took as deep a breath as she could. Then she knocked softly on the doorjamb, bracing herself as he turned.

"Lili," he smiled, and the relief in his voice made the breath catch in her throat.

She swallowed, hard. "Are you all right?"

"I'm _fine_," he said firmly, starting toward her, "just a little tired still. How about you?"

"Max _never _asked me that," she blurted, her hands clenching. "But you do all the time, and I never know what to say."

He paused, lips parted, then finally shrugged. "I'm not looking for some kind of 'approved' response. Say whatever you want to say, as long as it's the truth."

"I don't know what the truth is anymore," she whispered hoarsely, no longer able to look him in the eyes. "I just know that I never meant to hurt you. Scott, I'm so sorry--I _promise _it won't ever happen again. Whatever I have to do to figure this out, I'll--"

"_Lili_," Scott interrupted, right in front of her, and startled, she stepped back and looked up at him. "You don't owe me an apology--what happened this afternoon wasn't your fault."

"Not my fault?" she repeated dumbly. "How can you say that? How can you ask _me _to tell the truth but not be honest yourself? _I nearly killed you._"

"I _am_ being honest, Lili. Because it wasn't your fault, it was_ mine_. You were already building your powers up to a level you weren't sure you could control, and I was an idiot to touch you when I did. _I'm_ the one who should be apologizing here, for putting us both in danger from our powers. I'm just glad that you weren't hurt because of my ignorance."

Another apology. _To her._ Words like that had never come out of Max's mouth. She had no idea what to say.

He grinned. "I'll bet you weren't expecting that. You don't know what to make of us, do you?"

Slowly she shook her head. "I… didn't like living with Max," she said carefully," but at least I knew the rules. Here…"

"Our rules aren't that difficult, and I have the feeling there are a lot fewer. You'll figure them out."

That familiar ache rose in her, tightening her chest and shortening her breath. Lili shoved her hands in her pockets and only just managed to keep her feet from shuffling. She had to know, had to hear the words from him. "Then… I can stay?"

"Of course you can," he swiftly reassured her. "Lili, even if you had made a mistake, even if you had _hurt_ me, the Professor and I would never turn our backs on _any _mutant who's honestly learning control and being responsible with their power. Look, I know you don't trust us yet, but I want you to know, _I _trust _you._" And deliberately he put his hands on her arms, _exactly_ as he had in the lab.

She froze, only starting to breathe again when nothing happened. The fires within her were quiet.

"See? It's all right," he soothed, gently squeezing her arms. "When I told you that you'd be safe here, I didn't just mean from Max. We make mistakes here, we don't always say the right things, sometimes we need a lot of time to figure things out--and it's all right. All of it. It's safe here for you to relax and let down your guard and _learn_."

"Honestly?" she breathed, desperately searching his eyes for the truth.

"Honestly." With a final, relaxed squeeze to her arms he released her. "You have all the time in the world now, Lili. Just think about what I said, and we'll talk more tomorrow--or whenever you're ready. All right?"

He was still tired. She could see it now. Come to think of it, so was she. But he _wasn't_ lying… was he? She wanted so badly to believe him. And wasn't that why she'd come looking for him in the first place? All right, then--for now, she _would_ believe him. If he proved her wrong later, then she'd just have to deal with it. Relieved that she'd finally made the decision, Lili gratefully nodded.

"Good," he sighed. "Then I think I'm headed to my room. These examination tables aren't exactly the best places to rest. How about you?"

Scott hit the lights and Lili followed as he led the way back to the elevator. "I was thinking about chocolate peanut butter ice cream," she admitted.

He laughed. "Try the butter pecan."

"Then, it's all right to have some now?"

"Not a problem at all," Scott grinned. "Just clean up when you're done."

Lili couldn't help but smile back. She was staying. She had time. Scott wasn't angry with her. And she could have ice cream before she went to bed, just because she felt like it. She enjoyed every spoonful--of both kinds--and was almost back to her room, still walking in a near fog of wonder, when someone shouted for help and all her fears came rushing back with shuddering, breathtaking speed.

_That was the other new mutant, Logan. And he'd sounded desperate._

She ran back, terrified that she'd hurt Scott after all. But it was Rogue who ran past, not seeing her, not stopping, her nightgown torn and bloodied at her shoulder.

"Rogue?" Lili gasped. But Rogue got to her room too quickly, and the door slammed shut in Lili's face. She knocked anyway. "Rogue, it's Lili. What's wrong? What can I do?"

"Just leave me alone." The words were muffled, through tears as well as the door, but Lili knew the tone. Rogue needed some space, and she had to respect that.

She stepped closer to the door anyway. No one had ever been there for her, until Cyclops and Storm had come and gotten her. Maybe life _could _be different than what she'd always known. She could have _friends._ Like Scott and… like Rogue. "I'm just across the hall if you need me," Lili quietly offered.

Rogue didn't answer, but Lili knew she'd heard. It was the best she could do. Everything was still too new between them. She went back to her room and waited for hours, but wasn't surprized when Rogue didn't come to her.

X Eleven

Patiently Scott scanned the crowded train station, looking for one teenaged girl with long, dark hair, a long, green coat, and a potentially lethal mutation. _Poor kid._ He thought he'd done a decent job of smoothing things over with Lili after their accident, but then, Lili had come straight to him to talk about it. By the time Logan had recovered and Scott and Ororo had realized neither of them had sought out Rogue yet to see to _her_, she'd already been gone.

He blamed himself. He'd made it a priority to minimize whatever disruptions Logan might create, then let everyone down at the first opportunity. He couldn't possibly have foreseen Logan's nightmares or that Rogue would try to wake him, but he'd _known_ Wolverine would react with violence if anything went wrong, and when it had, he hadn't been able to so much as slow those adamantium claws and animalistic reflexes down, much less stop them from hurting someone.

_Damn it._ This was taking too long. Rogue was probably already on a train somewhere. Scott could only hope that Logan had found her. He frowned. That is, if Logan had been able to handle his motorcycle and was actually _at_ the train station. But all too predictably, Logan hadn't wanted to work with them, he'd worked alone, nor had he asked, he'd just _taken_. If he'd found the super accelerator on Scott's exhaustively customized bike and was wrapped around a tree somewhere, that simply wasn't Scott's fault.

Well now _that_ was a charitable thought. Scott sighed. He wasn't being fair. He didn't like Logan, didn't appreciate his arrogance or his aggression or the predatory way he approached Jean, and that had clouded his judgment. Instead of trying to earn the man's trust the way he might have already earned Lili's, he'd allowed himself to get caught up in Logan's male posturing. Great, just great. Not to mention completely unnecessary--no one was going to come between him and Jean. Even if he'd had a single moment's doubt--which he did _not_--the fact that Jean hadn't let him out of her sight for the entire day would have convinced him otherwise. He'd done everything he could think of to reassure her that he was fully recovered, but she'd barely left him alone for five minutes.

Which, as wonderful as it had been to spend so much time with Jean, unfortunately meant he'd had no chance to talk more with Lili. _Had_ he earned her trust? Would she be all right now?

_Be honest, Summers,_ he thought, his chest tight. _That's not what's kept you on pins and needles all day and put you in this strange mood. You want to know, can she teach you to control your power?_

There it was. He'd been mentally dancing around that single, burning question all day. If only he had the first clue how to go about finding the answer.

_Control._ Complete, organic, uninterruptible control. He was grateful beyond words for the series of steadily more efficient glasses and visors the Professor had created for him, but that didn't change the fact that he was depending on a _device_ to stop him from the wholesale destruction the power within him could wreak if he lost control for so much as an instant.

It would also be nice, he thought idly, if people no longer had a reason to stare at him. Scott glanced casually aside, trying not to tense up… and couldn't help smiling back at the little boy so intrigued by what he obviously thought were _cool sunglasses_. His mother, though, knew the difference, and _she _didn't think twice of yanking her son away. It still hurt. As if he needed a reminder of why the school was so important.

This was definitely taking too long. Rogue wasn't in there. They should call the Professor, see if he could determine what train she was on and whether Logan was with her. Time to go. Scott looked for Storm--_and found Sabretooth, lifting her by the neck._

_No clear shot._ He darted forward, hand to his visor's controls--_too many people_--drew breath to shout for people to duck--

_And something yanked his head around and ripped his visor away._

Stunned, stumbling, for a heartbeat he stared at the mutant on the ceiling, scampering away from _the beam of energy howling from his eyes._ Scott slammed them shut, but it was too late. The crimson sight of the roof blowing out was already burned into his brain. He spun, dropped, and listened with sick disbelief as people screamed and scuffled and debris thudded to the floor _and Sabretooth roared._

_Storm. _He couldn't see, _couldn't help her_, crouched useless and blind on the floor--and lightning sizzled overhead and something shattered in front of him and he was showered in debris as it whistled through the air. She'd struck. Scott waited, fists clenched, but the only thing he could hear now was the frightened scampering of people getting the hell out of an unexpected battlefield. Then there was nothing but shocked, empty silence.

"Storm?" he called. And waited. "_Storm?_"

_Damn it._ She was either down or in pursuit. If she was still fighting, she'd come back for him eventually. But if not… He was still facing the booth where he'd last seen her, wasn't he? Scott dropped to his hands and knees and started crawling, feeling ahead, to the sides, finding nothing but chunks of what had to be both floor and ceiling. "Storm?" What was that, soft--nothing, one of the thick velvet ropes they strung to make the lines. He pushed it aside, banged his hand on--just more debris--pushed that out of his way as well and crept forward. "Storm?"

"Here," he finally heard, a soft, pain-filled sigh. The relief made it hard to breathe.

"Thank God," he gasped. _Still ahead of him, to the left._ "Are you all right?"

"I think so. Just… dizzy."

"Where's Sabretooth?"

"Not here."

He was getting close. She shifted… and he found an ankle.

She started with his touch. "Scott?" And then she froze. "Where's your visor?"

"Gone," he admitted tightly, feeling his way alongside her. "I only had a second to see, but I think it was Toad."

"Sabretooth, Toad… _Magneto_. But--how did they know Logan was here?"

"I don't know--maybe they were watching the school. There's not much you or I can do right now to help him, though. We need to call the Professor." Scott slid her arm around his shoulders and got his feet under him and carefully lifted Storm back to hers, supporting her as she fought for balance.

_What a nightmare._ Soundly beaten, crippled, unable to protect Logan or--if she hadn't already been on a train out of there--Rogue. They couldn't even get back to the school without help. Oh, yes, and he'd destroyed a train station. He swallowed hard against the bitter anger rising in his throat. "Which way's out?"

_:North entrance. I'm sending Jean in for you.:_

"I'm sorry, Professor," Scott blindly shook his head. "They caught us completely off guard."

_:Not just you, Scott. I'm afraid… I've made a terrible mistake. Magneto has just left… with _Rogue.

X Twelve

The news had torn through the school like a tornado, even finding Lili on her window seat. Idly now she thumbed the course catalog she'd been reading so avidly just a few short hours ago.

Rogue… _gone._ _Taken_. She'd been so worried that Max would come for her, but this _Magneto_ had been the one to come, and for Rogue. _Why?_ Except that really wasn't all that hard to figure out, now that she'd heard the kids talking about Rogue's potentially lethal touch. If Magneto was anything like Max, he wanted to use Rogue, which meant he wanted her to touch someone. To kill, to persuade, or something else, Lili didn't know. Whatever the purpose, she was terrified for Rogue.

It was almost as hard to think about Cyclops and Storm, returning beaten and hurt. She'd _felt _the power within Scott--_burned_ with it--thought he and Ororo were two of the strongest people in the world. How could this have happened to _them_?

And that senator, collapsing in the hallway, a sickening trail of liquid left behind as they'd taken him down to the medical lab. What had happened to him? Would Jean be able to help him? _Why had he shown up when he did_, in the middle of everything? She'd never been a part of anything, not even any of those circuses, never had anyone or anything to worry about except Max and his rules and her performances. How was she supposed to handle all of this?

Lili shoved the catalog aside and restlessly paced to her open doorway. It was dinner time, but she couldn't even think of eating. It didn't look like anyone else could, either, if the number of kids in her hallway alone was any indication. But what could any of them do? The Professor wanted everyone to stay calm, go about their normal routine, do their homework… _Stay inside_, behind all of the locked doors_. Wait_. God, she hated waiting. Now more than ever. Then Bobby turned the corner, and Lili stepped into the hall and caught his eye.

"Bobby."

"They'll find her," he said, pausing, a quiet calm in his voice, his eyes. "They'll get Rogue back."

Lili nodded. "I thought she needed time, after the accident with Logan. Maybe what she really needed was someone to talk to."

He shrugged, running his hand through his hair, and she realized he was more deeply affected than he'd first appeared. "We're mutants. Sometimes I think that means we've always got too much going on in our heads."

"Maybe we do," she agreed, smiling wanly. "Any ideas up there about what we should do now?"

"I wish," he sighed. "I hate waiting." Then he stiffened. "Maybe we should ask him."

Lili turned. Logan, but pensive and brooding, not half as forceful as he'd seemed yesterday. "I don't think he'll--"

But Bobby had already left her side. Lili hurried after him.

"Logan, what's going on?"

Logan hesitated, eyeing Bobby, her--everyone in the hall waiting to hear what he had to say. "It's not good," he finally cautioned them. But no one moved. No one turned away. Lili was impressed. And apparently, so was Logan. "All right then," he gruffly continued. "Xavier used that Cerebro thing to try to find Rogue, but something went wrong and instead of helping, it hurt him. Jean says he's in a coma."

It was like all the air got sucked out of the hall, out of her lungs, in one massive gulp.

"Look," Logan hedged, "you know if anyone can come out of this, it's the Professor, all right? We just have to give him some time."

"And Rogue?" Bobby pressed.

Logan scowled. "We messed up. _I_ messed up. But we'll find her--I'll fix this. I just don't know how yet."

He stalked off, and with him went most of the restless energy that had been building in all of them. Lili took a deep breath, then another, and tried to gather her scattered thoughts, standing in the middle of the hallway as students drifted and clustered and drifted some more. What should she do? What _could_ she do? All right, well, waiting was definitely an option. She knew how to do that, whether alone in her room or with Bobby and the others. And that _was_ what everyone kept saying she should do. Lili grimaced. Except she'd had enough of that to last a lifetime. So--what else? She supposed she could sit with the Professor. Just another kind of waiting, though, and what would that accomplish? Could she go look for Rogue herself? Lili almost laughed out loud. Now _that_ was a stellar idea. She didn't have the first clue where to start or even how to get around out there on her own. Lili had no idea how long she stood there, alone in the silence, until finally one thing became clear.

If she'd found any answers at all in that place, they'd come from Scott. She'd see what he had to say. He was probably in one of the labs, she mused, _doing_ something to make all of this right. She very nearly ran for the elevator. The doors swished open to that smooth, pristine silver-white hallway and she stepped out. Now where--

"_Jean, NO!_"

Lili whirled, her jaw dropping at the sight of a desperate, anguished Scott Summers _pounding_ on one of the massive doors.

"_No, no, no--don't do this, Jean! PLEASE!_"

The last time she'd heard that much fear and dread in someone's voice, they'd been begging her not to burn them alive. The last time she'd felt that way, soundedthat way, she'd been begging Max not to kill her.

What on earth was Jean doing, to make Scott sound like that?

The lock released in a loud, startling _thunk_, a gap appearing as the doors opened. Scott pushed through, racing down a narrow walkway to where Jean crouched on the floor, but Lili didn't move. She couldn't. Not once she'd seen the look on Scott's face, heard the urgency in his low, splintered voice, seen it in his hands moving frantically over Jean. She should look away--this was intensely private, between Scott and Jean and no one else, but she couldn't tear her eyes away. That…

_That was love_. It had to be. Except she'd never seen love like _that_, never even come close to feeling it, couldn't possibly understand it. This was beyond her, way, _way_ out of any experience she'd ever had.

It was too much--_too much_--she'd never be able to do that. Scott and Jean were raw and open and she could never be that, could never trust anyone _that much_. Not after Max. Not after…

Oh, God… Max had taken _love _from her.

Something tore, deep within, and a black, gaping hole surged and shattered and sucked every last dream she'd ever had of love away. Max had been right all along. She really was nothing. Except _exactly _what he'd made her.

"Lili?" Scott called to her, breathless and surprized, and Lili blinked until she couldn't see Max anymore, _she didn't want to see him ever again_, until she was looking at the hallway and at Scott and Jean, her arm over his shoulders as he helped her walk. They were calmer now, the intensity of what was between them softer, muted. She could almost look at them without hurting. Another moment or two and she'd have herself under control, might even be able to speak and breathe and move.

"Go." Jean paused. "I'll meet you in the map room."

He nodded, waiting to release her until she took her own weight and could prove her own balance. But Jean swayed, and without thinking Lili reached out to help steady her.

"Are you all right?" Lili heard herself ask. But even as she said the words, she felt Jean gather herself and stand on her own.

"I will be," she said grimly. "Hurry, Scott."

He was already backing away. "Come with me, Lili."

Well, she'd wanted to help, wanted to _do_ something. Now wasn't the time to think about… With a last glance at Jean, Lili followed Scott. "Where are we going?"

He didn't answer, just led her into the communications room and left her standing there as he toggled a few switches on a panel marked _INTERCOM_. "Storm, Wolverine, I need you both in the map room, _now_."

If the intercom worked both ways, Scott didn't wait for them to answer. He was already pulling a small device from its holder on one of the shelves. "This is one of our communications units," he continued, returning to her with it. "Receiver, microphone, this button to acknowledge, just slide it over your ear and don't take it off. I'm leaving you in charge until we get back."

"In charge?" she stammered, holding the device like it might bite her. "Of what? Where are you going?"

He reached for her, settling his hands on her arms just like he had twice before, and Lili didn't think anyone had ever in her entire life looked at her as intently as Scott Summers did then.

"We know where Magneto is taking Rogue," he said, his hands tightening when she jerked in surprize. "I'm taking Storm and Jean and Wolverine and we're going to stop Magneto and bring Rogue back. I need _you_ to watch over the Professor and the school. You know Bobby and Peter--Colossus--and Kitty. They can help you. Just keep everyone inside, stay on comms, and call the police if there's anything you can't handle. Now let me see you put the comlink on."

Now it was her turn, to stare at him, to search those ruby red eyes for what might possibly have made him believe she could do what he was asking.

"_Lili_." He shook her, once, his grip painful. "I don't have the time to convince you. You've just got to trust me and _do this_, all right? I _know_ you can. Now put that thing on and get back upstairs. When we take off the kids will need you."

_He really thought she could do this._

He'd only known her four days. What did he see when he looked at her, to believe in her like that?

She had no idea. But anything was better than the nothing Max had left her with. Her hands shaking, Lili slid the device over her ear.

"Good girl," he grinned fiercely, cupping her cheek. Without another word he darted around her and bolted from the room.

Standing there in the silence, Lili closed her eyes and breathed deeply, just like she'd done before every one of thousands of performances. The ritual was calming, familiar, and she cleared her mind, of Max, of her fears and every last one of her doubts, and _focused_, not on the flames burning within her this time, but on the task Scott had left her with: _I need you to watch over the Professor and the school._ Not the senator, though. Lili shut all of her questions about him away. If Scott hadn't mentioned him, then the senator and her questions about him weren't important. One last, deep breath, and Lili turned and hurried back to the elevator.

She was just walking into the sprawling living room, now packed with kids, when a low rumbling began shaking the room. The sound must have been familiar to them, because all around her the kids calmly stood and moved to the windows.

Lili turned her head just in time to see the basketball court split apart, her jaw dropping as the dark chasm stretched wider and wider and a sleek shape rose into view.

_The jet. Of course. She'd wondered at the time how they'd gotten that thing underground._

The craft was very quiet, but Lili felt the heat as the engines powered up and the jet surged quickly out of sight. A moment later the court was closed again, as if nothing had happened, but it had and she had no idea what to say to these kids.

To _all_ of them. When had the rest come in?

"Are you in charge?" Kitty asked, but every last living being in the room was waiting for Lili to answer.

She nodded and had to clear her throat. "They've gone to get Rogue."

Bobby pushed through to her. "Did they say where?"

"I'm sorry, Bobby. There wasn't any time. Look," she continued, addressing all of them now, "hopefully they'll be back with Rogue soon. All we can do is wait. I don't know about any of you, but I hate waiting. So do whatever you need to do to get through this. Just stay inside, and stay calm. All right? If you need me for anything, I'll be right here in this room."

Some drifted out, but the majority stretched out and curled up and settled into the chairs and the sofas and across the floor. She'd have plenty of company while she waited. But the Professor was all alone.

"Bobby," she softly called him back. He needed something to distract him anyway. "Could you go sit with the Professor, please? He's down in the medical lab. I don't want him to be alone."

Bobby didn't say anything, just nodded and left, but she thought he'd been relieved to have something to do. Two of the others even went with him, and Lili was a little surprized to see that one of them was John. Well. Maybe there was more to him than she'd first thought.

Slowly Lili kicked off her shoes and sank into a chair that had somehow stayed empty, pressed the comlink more securely into her ear, and settled herself in to watch and wait.

The students were remarkably relaxed about the whole thing, drifting in and out as the first hour passed and the second wore on, with pillows and drinks and popcorn, sleeping in fits and spurts, another movie playing almost soundlessly on the television for the ones who stayed awake. Maybe that was because now, even if they weren't doing something themselves, they knew that Cyclops, Jean, Storm, and Wolverine were.

_X-Men_. That's what the kids were calling them. Cute. It would have played just as well in the circus as all of these nicknames that mutants were apparently fond of taking. But what about her? Did _she _want one of these nicknames for herself? Blaze? Inferno? _Firecracker?_ She wrinkled her nose. They reminded her too much of some of the things Max had billed her under over the years. Jean didn't have a nickname. Maybe she'd just stick with Liliana. Lili rearranged herself yet again in her chair and tried to relax and _the comlink beeped in her ear._ Half the heads in the room popped up and turned to her.

Oh, God. Not now, not when Scott wasn't there, not when _she_--it beeped again, sounding quite insistent to her frazzled nerves. Teeth clenched, Lili touched the little button to acknowledge.

_"Security alert,"_ a computerized voice informed her. _"Perimeter breached. Motion detected in greenhouse."_

She breathed deeply to ease the leaden weight in her belly and slowly stood. "It's probably nothing," she said softly, to no one and everyone, praying it _was_ nothing--_Could squirrels set off these alarms?--_ "but I need to check out the greenhouse. If I'm not back in five minutes or things start to get loud, lock yourselves into the labs and call the police."

Word went like wildfire through the room as she moved to the hall. By the time she got there, Kitty and Peter were waiting. Lili paused and raised an eyebrow at them.

"You might need some help," Peter said solemnly, his skin morphing to metal right before her eyes. She blinked, astonished, and a heartbeat later he was back to normal. So that'swhat he'd meant by "Colossus."

"Don't worry--we've both started training for combat," Kitty added.

_Combat?_

The word shook her to her bones. She hadn't felt ready to be _in charge_, much less to go into _combat_.

_You've just got to trust me and do this, all right? I know you can. _Scott. He was counting on her. And downstairs, even though he didn't know it, so was the Professor.

"All right," Lili breathed, _really_ praying it was nothing now. "Thanks."

She broke into a run because the urge to curl up into a ball and hide was so huge. Her bare feet were soundless on the smooth floors, and her two self-appointed helpers kept up easily. They didn't slow until they approached the last turn leading to the greenhouse.

"Wait," Kitty whispered. "Let me look." She disappeared into the wall for a long, nerve-wracking moment. Abruptly she popped back out. "There are two of them, with masks, body armor, and some really big guns."

Lili's heart sank. And then she squared her shoulders. Whatever this place turned out to be for her, she'd seen it be a school and a safe haven and a home for these kids, and they were counting on her. Besides, _what if it was Max out there?_ What if everyone was in danger because of _her_? Lili clenched her fists and inhaled, deeply, and stirred the embers to life. She wasn't going anywhere. And neither was anyone else. _She would _not _let these men hurt or take anyone._

"Kitty, get back and warn the others," she breathed the words on the hiss and crackle of the rising flames, and Kitty turned wordlessly and ran. "Peter, stay out of sight. Unless they get past me."

He nodded, and she stoked the flames higher and turned the corner as they stepped into the corridor from the greenhouse entrance. They didn't see her in the shadows. Lili made the flames skip delicately in the air around her, illuminating herself.

"Looking for something?"

The guns came up fast, but she sent the heat surging into the steel, melting and fusing and searing, and amidst the gasps and the curses the weapons clattered to the floor.

One reached to his back, yanking, and Lili _pushed_ with a wave of heat, sending the knife and the men crashing into the wall. She didn't wait, dancing the flames across their clothes, into their packs, until she knew everything they carried. With pinpoint precision she _focused_, flinging spears of _heat_ into the rest of the weapons. Not enough to ignite, just to warp, to fuse, to ruin. The men spat and swore at her, trying to crawl back out to the greenhouse, but they didn't get far, convulsing almost comically to get away from the heat pricking at them.

Before they could try again Lili ignited the air and threw a circle of flames around them, tightening it and shifting it until they crouched back to back in the center of the hall. She held them there, capriciously letting the flames dip and twist and howl with hunger, until Peter came up behind her and she realized it was over.

She'd done it. She'd stopped them.

_"Lili?"_

Scott! The relief made her knees feel like rubber. "Here."

_"We're on our way back, ETA twenty minutes. You can tell everyone that Rogue is fine. Logan's badly hurt, but he's tough. He'll live. How is everything there?"_

_Twenty minutes?_ Butterflies flashed round in her stomach. It wasn't Max, or Gustav, but she recognized the menace in those fire-lit eyes, knew the pain those hard hands could inflict. What if they got away from her? What if they hurt someone? What if--

_"Lili? Is something wrong?"_

Twenty minutes. _For Pete's sake, Lili_, she admonished herself. She'd practiced at this level of power for _hours_, every day, for _years_. She took a deep breath. "I'm fine, Scott. We're _all_ fine--we've just got company. Two men with a lot of weapons who tried to break in through the greenhouse. I can hold them until you get back. Or should we call the police?"

_"If you can move them safely, lock them up in the walk-in freezer,"_ Scott said, his voice tight. _"I'll deal with them when we're back. Lili, I'm sorry, I thought--"_

"It's as good as done," she interrupted, widening the fiery circle enough for the men to stand and moving it to force them towards her. "Please don't worry, Scott. I can do this. Just… get back here, all right?"

_"I want you to check in every five minutes."_

Lili didn't know if that was to make her feel better or him--and she didn't care. "Five minutes," she agreed. "Peter, could you lead the way to the freezer, please?"

Eyes narrowed in concentration, she pushed and prodded the men along behind him. Exhilaration rushed through her veins--that she'd protected these kids--that her control was rock steady at this intensity--that maybe she'd done something to repay Scott and the Professor, at least a little, for taking her away from Max--but she reined herself in, maintaining her focus. She didn't let herself start shaking until Peter locked the door of the freezer on their guests.

So that was combat

X Thirteen

"On final approach," Scott called over his shoulder, disengaging the stealth mode and remotely triggering the landing bay doors to open. Behind him Jean still worked on Logan with a first aid kit that had already proven to be woefully inadequate, while Ororo spoke quietly with Rogue, as she had for the entire flight.

He'd been absurdly grateful for the time alone at the controls. His back hurt and his head ached, and there'd been a lot for him to think about. Just the _thought_ of how Jean had risked herself with Cerebro still left him shaking and cold. He was unsettled by how easily Magneto had pinned them down in the torch, but excited by how well the four of them had worked together. Rogue and every last dignitary on Liberty Island were safe, but they'd lost Senator Kelly, Rogue was clearly upset, Logan was in bad shape, and the Professor still hadn't woken up. Not to mention he had two commandos in the freezer and a school full of worried students, but apparently Lili had kept things under control at that end.

_They'd done it._ The last several hours had been some of the most trying of his life, but they'd actually done it. They'd averted a catastrophe of epic proportions and would, he was confident, all live through it to tell the tale. Next up, though… all of the fallout. He was glad he'd thought to swallow some of the painkillers in that first aid kit, because he didn't think he'd be getting to bed any time soon.

Scott extended the landing gear as he slowed the jet, shifted the engines to hover mode, and descended smoothly from the darkness of night to the welcoming light of the open bay. She settled gently to ground and he flipped the switch to open the rear ramp, cycling swiftly through shutdown as the bay doors slid together overhead.

"I'll take him," he heard, and pushed up from his seat and turned to see Peter carefully lifting Logan into his massive arms. "Lili sent me to help. She's waiting for you at the freezer, Scott. She thought you'd want to speak to everyone, so she had Kitty gather them all in the living room."

Neatly done. Scott felt a little better about leaving Lili in charge with next to no warning and even less preparation. He nodded his thanks to Peter. "Jean, let me know if there's any change with the Professor and keep me posted on Logan. Storm, can you get Rogue settled and see to the rest of the students? Let everyone know I'm canceling classes for tomorrow."

Which just left the commandos. Scott pulled his gloves off and rubbed wearily at his temples as he walked, but he didn't stop to change, heading straight for the kitchen and its nice, big walk-in freezer. What was he going to do with those two without the Professor or Jean to help figure out who or what they'd been after? He was still pondering his options when he reached the kitchen and found Lili sitting on the floor, her back pressed to the wall opposite the freezer, watching the freezer door with that fierce intensity of hers.

"Lili?"

She jerked to her feet and turned to meet him, and Scott pulled up short. Her eyes were _burning._

"Are you all right?" he asked warily, taking a slow, cautious step closer.

"I thought I was," she said, her voice brittle, and with another careful step closer he could see that she was trembling. "But… Scott, they came for _me_."

His eyebrows rose. "What makes you say that?"

"At first I thought they were familiar because Max always had that kind of man around him. Then I realized I hadn't just seen men _like_ them with Max--I'd seen _them_."

"Damn," he said softly. Maximillian Sarkaroff must have some serious contacts or one helluva lot of luck to track Liliana down like that. And after all his promises of safety, he'd left her alone to fight the very men he'd promised wouldn't ever even show up. "I'm so sorry, Lili. I can't--"

"They only saw me," she interrupted, fists clenching and unclenching at her sides. "I mean, they saw Peter, too, but not as Colossus. So they don't know about anyone else--that the school is for mutants. I can leave, get lost out there, and Max will follow _me_ and everyone else will--"

"Lili, _no_," he gasped. "Absolutely not."

"But--"

"That's no kind of life for you--and no guarantee that Max wouldn't find you again anyway. Look, I'm sorry that I misjudged him and I'm _really_ sorry that we weren't here to protect you like I promised. You may not believe me now, but there is no safer place in the world for people like us than _right here_, where we're loved and accepted and where we can look out for each other."

She stilled. "Loved?"

"You've only been here a few days, Liliana, but there would be holes in a lot of people's lives if you just disappeared. Including mine."

She wrapped her arms around herself and closed her eyes for a long moment. When she opened them again, the panic was gone from her eyes… but the flames still raged. "Everyone here is in danger if I stay. If Max learns this school is full of children with powers he could exploit… Scott, _I have to go._ Even if it means Max will find me. I can't let him do… what he did to me to anyone else. I'd never be able to live with myself."

"And how do you think everyone else would feel, knowing you'd given up your freedom and your future to buy their safety? Especially when it's not necessary at all."

"_You don't know Max._"

"Maybe not, but I do know there are ways of dealing with people like him. The Professor and I will handle this, Lili. We'll turn these two in to the police and we'll find a way to buy or warn Max off--or we'll turn _him_ in to the police, too, for exploiting you all those years. Even if we can't prove kidnapping, we'll be able to prove _that_. And if he sends someone else, we'll deal with it. If he hurts someone or takes someone, _I promise you_, we'll deal with it."

She shook her head, not convinced, misery and fear written all over her face. Considering how closed and difficult to read she'd been when she'd arrived, it wasn't lost on him that she was now allowing him to see so much. Either Liliana had somehow come to trust him, or she was too worked up to hide anything from him. He reached and offered her his hand, careful not to risk getting too close just quite yet.

"You've been lost all your life, Lili. But now you have friends--people who care, who'll stand up for you, who don't want you to go and who especially don't want you to be alone again. Promise me that whatever you decide to do with your life, you won't just leave like that."

Her gaze dropped to his outstretched hand, the silence stretching so long it was very nearly painful. "I don't _want _to go," she finally admitted, her voice tight with a thousand emotions he couldn't even begin to identify.

"Then don't," he said softly. "Please."

"There's going to be a price if I stay," she warned, raising those burnings eyes to his. "And it might be a lot higher than you think."

He thought of the Professor, Logan, even the senator. What Jean had risked, what Rogue had endured. "It usually is," he agreed. "But some things--some people--are worth it."

Lili stared at him, long and hard, until the flames in her eyes finally flickered one last time and were gone. "You're sure?" she pressed.

Scott took that last step to her and firmly took her hand in his. "I'm sure, Lili."

"Then I'll stay," she nodded, and for a moment he was so relieved that he couldn't speak. But then her hand tightened on his. "There's just one thing."

"And that is?"

"You said men like Max can be warned off. I want you to let me do that."

He hadn't been expecting _that_ from her. "What did you have in mind?"

Again she hesitated, until the words rushed out of her. "I need you to trust me."

It floored him, that she would admit to needing something--anything--from anyone else at all, much less only a few short days after she hadn't even wanted him to know she was _thirsty_. She'd surprized him--almost as much as she'd apparently surprized herself. "All right, Lili," he managed. "I do trust you."

Lili blew her breath out noisily and backed away, loosing her hand from his. "Then we're not going to need the police. Could you please open the freezer?"

He hadn't expected _that_ from her, either. There was a fairly long list of people who could have asked him that and he would have been worried about what they would do--but Lili wasn't on it. Wordlessly he did as she asked, stepping back as the oversized door swung open and two very large, very cold, very angry men tried to rush him. But a wall of flames erupted around them, pulling them up short and trapping them in the middle of the kitchen.

"I remember you," Lili said, the sound of rushing wildfire in her voice. "I know Max sent you for me. Tell him I said no. Tell him--"

The wall of fire narrowed to a single, white-hot stream encircling the men at chest level that tightened in a blazing rush, blackening the fabric of their vests and sleeves.

"_Tell Max to leave me alone_," Lili spat, and the stream split into two blindingly bright arcs that seared across their faces and then blasted into thin air.

_She'd marked them_, identical burns running from chin to ear. But they didn't have time to react, not even to scream, before a giant _whoosh_ of heat rushed past Scott, lifting the two men and heaving them through the French doors. Scott winced away from shattered glass and splinters of wood, heard the thuds as the men hit the ground. They did start shouting in pain then, and he raised his head in time to see both of them scramble to their feet and limp away across the grounds.

Scott whirled back to Lili. It wasn't just her eyes burning this time, her _hands _were aflame, too, shimmering and molten and stunning in their ferocity. But her shirtsleeves weren't even singed, and already the intensity was dimming. Storm ran into the kitchen, her eyes white with power, but Scott held up his hand and now they watched together as Lili pulled the fires back within her.

_Control_. Complete, _perfect_ control. Scott could only stare at her, the need within him for that kind of control like a razor through his soul.

Finally Lili blinked the last of the flames from her eyes and the mantle of power he'd seen in every line of her body disappeared. She was just Liliana again, looking at him with a barely contained need for approval. "I'm sorry about the doors," she said nervously, "but men like Max don't understand anything but force."

"What just happened here?" Storm demanded.

_What, indeed_. Scott cleared his throat. "Liliana was just taking care of something personal, Storm. And Lili--the doors can be replaced."

Lili nodded, relaxing a little. "I'll just get all this debris cleared up. What about the--"

The comlinks that he, Storm, and Lili were still wearing beeped. _"I need all three of you down in med lab,"_ Jean said, the relief in her voice so thick that Scott felt one of the knots in his stomach start to unwind. _"The Professor's awake!"_

"On our way," Scott grinned.

X Fourteen

She should be exhausted. _There was so much to think about_. Her entire world had been turned upside down in the space of a few short, but tumultuous days, she had no idea what she was doing, and Lili knew she should be out flat on her back somewhere. Except she didn't feel tired at all. In fact, she could barely stand still as she rode the elevator back down with Scott and Ororo and had a hard time holding herself to a walk on the way to med lab.

Scott wanted her to stay. He knew the dangers, and he _still_ wanted her to stay.

Here, in this school, with these people, she had a chance of finding all the things she'd longed for, all the things Max had taken from her. Even if she never learned to open herself to the kind of love she'd seen between Scott and Jean, she could have a _life_ here.

A life… _without Max_. He'd come for her, but he hadn't won. _She_ had.

It was the most intoxicating moment of her entire life.

Seeing the Professor sitting up in his chair and smiling, wrapped in a dark blue robe and free of all those wires and tubes--seeing the joy shining in all of their faces--Lili felt like her feet weren't even touching the ground. But then she saw Logan on the far examining table, bruised and bloodied and battered beneath a host of bandages and tubes, and she came back down to earth with a resounding thud.

This was for real. There were more dangers out there than just Max. _She was in way over her head_. Lili held back from the quiet celebration, suddenly unsure why the Professor had included her in his summons.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to help," the Professor was saying, a bit of an edge to his voice and something sparking deep in his eyes when he looked at Jean. "You took an awful risk."

"I know," Jean said, lowering her gaze.

Scott tensed, and Lili remembered those desperate moments between him and Jean and wondered once more what Jean had done.

"I'm relieved to hear of your success against Magneto," the Professor continued. "You're certain the police have him contained?"

"I forwarded his dossier, just in case," Scott assured him.

"Then we've done all we can for tonight," the Professor sighed, his glance straying for a long, solemn moment to Logan.

"He's stable," Jean informed them. "I think it's just a matter of time until the effect wears off and his mutation kicks in again and heals him."

His mutation was an ability to heal? Lili wondered how he'd gotten a nickname like _Wolverine_ from that. There must be more to him than she knew. She frowned. There was _a lot_ that she didn't know. Too much, perhaps.

"Well, Liliana?" The Professor turned that all-seeing gaze of his on _her_. "I understand you were rather busy tonight yourself. What do you think?"

They all turned to her, and Lili made herself stand still under those penetrating stares. "About what, sir?"

"I'm just the Professor," he reminded her, a gentle smile shaping his lips. "Can you give me your assessment of your actions here at the school?"

He was serious, she realized, actually treating her like she was somehow a part of… _all this._ Cyclops and Storm and Jean were wearing those leather costumes, while she stood there, barefoot, in a t-shirt and a pair of jeans that didn't even belong to her. She still had one of their comlinks in her ear, but it and the elevator were pretty much the only two things down there that she knew how to use. They'd somehow saved Rogue and stopped this Magneto from doing whatever he'd tried to do, while she'd been back at the school locking two men looking for _her_ in the freezer. It was no contest--the only way she could be farther from being a part of these people and this school was if they'd never come for her in the first place.

And yet there they all were, waiting patiently for her answer.

All right, then. She'd decided to stay, and if this was how things worked… What _did_ she think? Lili sifted through scattered, disorganized, half-understood thoughts and feelings about Max and a lifetime of his rules and the school--everyone she'd met there, everything that had happened there, every single step she'd taken, and all the possibilities she was only just beginning to believe could exist for her.

"I think my world used to be very small, Professor," she finally replied. "I'm grateful that you came for me, but… your world is huge, and it's complicated, and I have no idea what I'm doing in it."

"What you did tonight was protect the Professor and our students," Storm said.

"You did very well," Scott agreed. "Actually, in hindsight, I wish you'd been with us. Now that I've seen how precise your control is, I know exactly how you could have helped us stop Magneto."

_Help them stop Magneto?_ "I don't…" Lili slowly shook her head, stepping back from them as if she stepped back from the edge of a cliff. "This is too much. I… I need you to take it a little slower."

"Then let's start with your control," the Professor offered. "You're confident of your control now?"

Lili paused, and turned her attention inward. This was a question she could--and _should--_consider. The fires within her were banked and easy, illuminating her and filling her with warmth. She inhaled, stirring the embers gently, feeling the power awakening, ready to surge through her and burn as she bid.

_As she bid._ She'd lost herself among the flames in Manhattan, shocked with pain and fear and fury and the extraordinary strength she'd never had before, but since the afternoon of tests here at the mansion she knew the precise width and height and breadth of what she could now call up--and thanks to the accident with Scott, what she could take in. She knew her limits.

She exhaled, soothing the flames back down, blinking them from her vision until she could once more meet the Professor's eyes. "Yes," she said simply. "I am."

The Professor nodded, obviously satisfied, and Ororo and Jean smiled at her in approval. But Scott nervously shifted. "Do you think… Can you teach me?"

"Scott?" Jean protested, sounding and looking even more startled than Lili felt, but Ororo and the Professor were staring at Lili thoughtfully. "Scott," Jean repeated, more controlled now, "you _know_ this isn't merely a matter of will, or you would have figured it out years ago. The only off switch your power came with is closing your eyes."

Scott's jaw tightened, and he took Jean's hand in his in a grip Lili could see was almost painful. "I'd like an answer," he said hoarsely.

Ororo shrugged. "My powers are too different from his. I couldn't help him."

"Neither could I," Xavier confessed, sighing. "This isn't really the time or place, but now that the question has been asked… What do you think, Liliana?"

They were all staring at her again, warring emotions in each and every gaze. Except Scott's. There was nothing in his ruby eyes but pure hope and burning need.

What on earth did they expect of her?

"Please, Lili," Scott begged, and it shook her to realize she'd heard him sound that desperate twice in the same night. And this time, he was looking to _her_.

This was Scott. He was the only person in the entire world she even halfway trusted, he'd come through for her, and he _needed_ an answer.

Lili locked her gaze on his and once more called up the heat within her. Silently she stoked the flames, fueling them with her strength and her purpose and her will, until the conflagration roared within, dancing crimson and gold in her vision.

She looked at Scott through the flickering, shimmering heat, _looked _at _his _heat and his _power as it coiled within him, circling and twisting and pulsing and--_ _There was a pattern. A beautiful, intricate, sinuous pattern that drew her eyes to follow it, that called on her heat to join it, that sang and enticed and--_

Lili closed her eyes and broke the contact, clenching her fists and calling on every ounce of her control to force the howling flames back down--_DOWN--down_--until they only glowered, only flickered, only shimmered silently once more.

Swaying on her feet, Lili forced her tired eyes open and took a deep, shuddering breath, grateful when Ororo came over to steady her. "I don't know," Lili gasped, "maybe." Scott went completely still, and Lili offered him what she could.

"There's a pattern to your power, Scott, channels that it flows along, and maybe--if I can help you see that pattern--_maybe_ you could learn to control it." His eyes blazed, and Jean went white, and Lili stammered out the rest of it. "But the power within you is _always _at full strength, where I learned control at much lower levels. You have to dial your power down to use it, while I have to stoke mine up. I don't know if you'll ever have the strength to direct that much power, all the time. Plus…" she took another deep breath, but for all their sakes this had to be said, no matter how… _intimate_ the topic felt to her.

"Lili?" Scott prompted.

Lili looked down at her bare feet, away from Jean's too-piercing stare and the hope still shining in Scott's, and unclenched her fists, so they could all see the trembling. "The most difficult thing for me once I've called the fires up is banking the power without expending it--absorbing the heat back into me, without sending it somewhere else. And that's just my own. When I'm _burning_ with you like that… It's an incalculable amount of power--far too much for me to easily control--and it would have to go _somewhere_. Because I don't think we can do this without burning together."

The Professor nodded. "You'll need a safe way to release the heat, without incinerating either of you or whatever facility you're in. I think I know where--"

"Professor, you can't be serious," Jean gaped.

There was sympathy in the Professor's gaze as he looked at Jean, but his eyes hardened and all Lili saw then was unwavering conviction. "We're all dangerous, until we learn control. _You know that, Jean._ Even with the artificial control of his visor, Scott is still quite, _quite_ dangerous, because despite any number of precautions the visor can all too easily be taken from him." Jean looked away from that firmly tendered rebuke, Scott scowled, and Lili nodded, even though she could feel her nerves tightening again, even though she _knew_ there was far more going on here than she knew or was even remotely ready to hear.

The Professor waved his hand, a gesture that encompassed all of them. "You're already a part of the team, Liliana, however unintentionally. You've trusted us, and you've proven that we can trust you. You've worked with us, you've defended this house, and you've just said you're willing to try to teach Cyclops."

Charles Xavier paused to smile at her, kindly. "We have a lot to discuss about your situation," he continued softly, "but I'd like you to consider staying and becoming a part of the

X-Men. Will you?"

He'd asked. Not demanded, not cajoled, certainly not threatened, not even tried to make a deal. He'd _asked_. But the implications were simply too much for her to handle.

"Professor," she stammered, but he leaned forward and it felt as if he physically reached across the room and covered her hand with his.

_:All I ask is that you consider it, Liliana. All right?:_

This was it. This was what it felt like to have _choices_. It was terrifying and wonderful and she didn't know if she was going to dance around the room next or find a quiet place to be sick. Either way, though… she'd be doing it there.

"I'll consider it, Professor."

X Fifteen

Scott sucked in a huge breath of relief--_Lili really was staying, at least for now, and she'd offered to help him_--but even in his joy he knew Jean was tense with unhappiness next to him. He gentled his hand on hers, trying wordlessly to make her understand.

"Then I do believe that everything else will wait until the morning," the Professor sighed. "Speaking of which--Scott, I don't want to worry any of the students, but considering the hour I think it would be best if we cancelled classes for tomorrow."

"Already done, Professor," Scott agreed. "Nearly all of them waited up for us, and I just didn't think anyone would be ready."

"Thank you," Xavier nodded. "Jean, is there any way of knowing how long it will be before Logan wakes?"

"I'm sorry, Professor," she replied, pulling away from Scott and turning to her monitors. Scott felt his stomach drop. Had she _ever_ turned her back to him like that before? "I just don't have enough data."

The Professor frowned. "Someone should stay with him tonight."

"I'll do it," Lili volunteered. She shrugged. "I don't think I could sleep anyway."

"Thank you, Liliana," the Professor said. "Then I'll say good night to you all. Shall we say breakfast at ten?"

"How about brunch at eleven?" Storm countered as she followed him out.

"Have you seen our students eat?" Scott heard the Professor protest mildly from the hall. "There won't be anything left by then."

"Ten thirty?" Storm tried again. They were still going back and forth about it when Scott heard the elevator door close behind them. That left him with Jean, Liliana, Logan… and a whole lot of silence.

"Jean?" he finally, softly begged her rigid back.

"I'm not comfortable leaving him," she said tightly.

"_Jean_."

She took a long, deep breath and half turned to Lili. "We're on the second floor, last door on the left. If anything changes _at all_, come get me."

"I will," Lili promised.

Jean acknowledged her with an abrupt nod, then whirled and swept right past them both. She was angry and hurt and all wound up and he wished he had the freedom to run after her right that second to find out why. But he didn't, and he knew it. His power had always come first, since that very first time he'd opened his eyes to a world turned suddenly, painfully crimson. And right now, that meant there was something he had to say to Liliana August.

"Thank you, Liliana," he managed. "Even if this doesn't work, I can't tell you what it means to me that you'll try."

"You came to get me," she said, as if that explained everything. For her, maybe it did.

Scott smiled and began backing toward the door. "We'll talk tomorrow, then."

"Good night, Scott."

With a wave he left her with Logan, getting to the elevator just in time to throw his hand between the closing doors. They pulled apart again, and once more he was facing Jean's back. This time he didn't have to wait--he stepped in and reached for her, sliding his arms around her and pressing himself to her still rigid back.

"You know I have to do this," he said the words into her hair.

She spun around in his arms, shaking with an anger and a fear that stunned him. "How could you even _think_ of risking yourself like this?"

"Like what, Jean?" he managed. "Like you risked yourself tonight to use Cerebro?"

"That was different and you know it."

"We needed information and you risked a permanent vegetative state to get it," Scott frowned, that terrible fear rising in him once more and tightening his hands on her arms. "Are you saying that you're the only one who knows how to make a sacrifice--or that learning real control isn't as good a reason to risk myself?"

"Don't be ridiculous--we've all made sacrifices to get to this point." The elevator doors slid open and roughly Jean shrugged off his arms. "But as for control, the only person I ever met with more control than you is the Professor. How much more do you need?" She stepped sharply around him, heading for the bedroom they shared--that they had shared since almost from the beginning--and slammed the door shut behind him with the power of her mind.

Scott closed his eyes tightly and pulled the visor from his head. "Is this what you mean by _control_?" he snapped bitterly into the darkness. "Keeping my eyes shut, Jean? Living with so much fear of hurting someone that I learned to wake up without _ever_ opening my eyes? Toad yanked my visor off and I never even heard him coming. Wasn't it great of Magneto to warn me first, so that I didn't blow straight through you and the Statue of Liberty like I did the train station? Would you rather I screwed this damned visor into my head? What if this works, Jean? _What if this works?_"

He felt her presence in front of him, then her hands on his, folding around them and the visor to raise it back to his face and press it carefully into place. He opened his eyes with hope to see her precious face staring up at him, but her eyes were dark with dread and still sparking with anger. "What if it doesn't?" she pressed. "I took one very small, very calculated chance because there was no other way to get the information we needed in time. _You already have control_, Scott, however imperfect your visor may be. But this… You didn't see what I saw in the lab that afternoon. You didn't _see_ the inferno the two of you created or Lili's struggle to control it. She's going to get you killed--"

"No--my power might get me killed," he corrected, "or hers, or ours together. But _Lili_ would never hurt me, Jean. You heard her in the lab that day, right before it happened. If anything, Liliana would likely incinerate herself before she'd intentionally let her power hurt me or anyone else."

"What makes you trust her with your life like that?" Jean cried.

"Is _that_ what this is about?" he gaped at her, grabbing her hands when she would have turned restlessly away once more. "_Lili_?"

No. _No._ There was no way she could know how… _exciting_ it had been, to feel Lili's heat engulf him, to _burn_ with her. It didn't matter. He'd never even be tempted to act on it, because Lili simply wasn't Jean. So he'd buried that deep, hadn't even confided it to the Professor, because if he didn't tell anyone about it, didn't so much as acknowledge the desire that had hammered through him, then Jean would never have any reason… to doubt him. Except she didn't doubt him, did she? He had complete faith in their love, but since Logan had crashed into their lives, he'd been walking a fine, edgy line of jealousy anyway. And while Lili wasn't pursuing him the way Logan broadcast his interest in Jean for all to see, that didn't mean Jean wasn't picking up on _something_. Maybe he hadn't buried those feelings as deeply as he'd thought. Maybe she needed the words after all.

"I love you, Jean," he said fiercely. "You're my best friend and the best part of me and nothing and no one will ever change that. I'm sorry you can't be the one to help me learn this control. But I didn't ask for it to be Liliana, and I won't pass up this opportunity just because it is. You know as well as I do that my first responsibility isn't to you or the Professor or even to me--it's to this incredible power. I have no choice."

When she didn't answer Scott raised her palm to his cheek and touched his lips to hers in a tender, delicate kiss. "Please, Jean," he whispered, cradling her hand against his face. "Please tell me you trust me, that you understand."

Wordlessly she burrowed into his chest, clinging to him, her mind reaching for his, and Scott wrapped his arms around her and held on tightly, love and gratitude and relief and even Jean's fears cascading through them and leaving them both shaking.

"Of course I trust you, Scott," she finally murmured. "I just don't trust Liliana's control the way you do. If she's even one iota wrong in assessing her control, you could die in this experiment of yours, and what would any of us do if that happened? The X-Men need your leadership, Scott--and I'd be completely lost without you."

"No," he said thickly, tangling his fingers in her hair. "You're so much stronger than you see in yourself, Jean. If anything ever happened to me you'd find a way to keep going. _I know it_. What I don't know is how I'd be able to so much as _breathe_ if I lost you." It was all there in his thoughts, he was wide open to her, but she had other things on her mind.

"I'm not going anywhere," she swore, raising her face to his, the first sparks of hunger spiraling through her.

"I'm not either," he promised, savoring the feel of her mind touching his even more intimately than their bodies, and lowered his mouth to hers.

He wanted the kiss to be gentle, wanted to cherish and reassure and soothe her. But too much had happened--with Magneto, the Professor, with _Logan_--that day, everything between them--and instead he crushed her to him and took her mouth with a ferocity he rarely allowed himself. She gasped and for one single, burning moment he was desperately afraid he'd gone too far. But then Jean moaned and opened her mouth beneath his and arched hard into him and Scott abandoned every last thought of _control_ in the fury of desire that roared through him.

With one last, hard kiss, he spun Jean around and tore at her uniform's zipper and all that black leather until there was nothing but pale, smooth skin beneath his rough hands. She reached for him, as desperate as he, but Scott backed her against the bed and pushed her down onto it and ripped his own uniform off and followed her down. He stroked her, sucked her, thrust his fingers into her and made her come with his hand while he felt her every emotion careening through her soul, hearing them in her every gasp and moan, watching them in every rapt expression filling her beautiful face. She was still trembling, still clinging to him, orgasm still rippling through her, when he turned her over and raised her hips and rose to his knees and took her hard and hot and so deliciously wet from behind. Jean threw her head back, hands fisting in the sheets, meeting his every thrust, his every demand, his every burning need, until he drove them both over the edge into a fiery explosion that fused and seared and left them twined and trembling as one.

There was gentleness then, and softness, and a sweetness that took his breath away. But there was also uncertainty, and aching weariness, and a quiet, burning fear that he couldn't ignore or relieve, that kept them clinging and loving long into the night.

X Sixteen

Choices. She had choices, for the first time in her life. But having choices meant actually making decisions, and who knew how difficult _decisions_ would be? Sitting silent and alone in the cafeteria, Lili sighed and pushed the melted remains of her ice cream away. She'd asked to stay, _decided _to stay, and now she would leave anyway, because she'd agreed to try to teach Scott. But… was that the right choice?

Jean clearly didn't think so. She'd done nothing more than walk into med lab that morning, check Logan for herself, thank Lili for keeping an eye on him, and tell her she'd take over then. But her smile had been forced, her eyes full of a weary resignation that one time she'd been able to look at Lili, and her body had held a barely contained tension that Lili could never have missed, after living so long with Max. This worried Jean, deeply, and Lili could have read her mistrust a mile away.

On the other hand, Ororo had been open and cheerful when she'd whisked Lili away to her first real department store for her very first shopping spree. Lili had new clothes, new shoes, new cosmetics and barrettes, and even a few of her own new books, all tucked away in the pretty new paisley suitcases sitting packed and waiting in her room. But as gentle and encouraging as Ororo had been, she'd also been rushed and distracted, excusing herself a number of times to answer her cell phone. Lili had caught just enough to realize that Scott had a lot of responsibilities at the school, which Ororo was intent on picking up while he was gone. At least she hadn't ever looked at Lili like all that extra work was somehow her fault.

Lili hadn't seen Scott yet, but then, she hadn't needed to. He wanted control, so badly that not even Jean's concerns would stop him from trying to get it. He'd already known the dangers and the price he might have to pay when he'd asked Lili if she could teach him, and judging by Jean's reaction that morning and all of Ororo's calls that afternoon, nothing had changed.

That scared her more than anything. Because _she_ had been the one to make this decision. If things went badly, it would be _her_ fault. If Scott ever came to regret this, the blame would lie solely with her. And even if what Scott had said about having the freedom to make mistakes now was true, Lili didn't think she'd be able to live with herself, much less do so at the school, if she somehow hurt the first friend she'd ever had.

Was it worth it, risking their lives, whatever sense of peace she might have found there, and even her place in this school to try this? She had nowhere else to go, and didn't even know if this would work.

Or… _did_ she have somewhere else to go? Her breath caught in her throat, what little she'd managed to eat now churning in her stomach. Lili hadn't allowed herself to think of them for years--hadn't dared let Max see--hadn't been able to risk the constant, crushing disappointment of their loss, of her longing--

_What if Charles Xavier could help her find her mother--her real family?_

Were they out there? Did they think of her, wonder about her, _miss_ her? Did she have siblings, cousins, grandparents? God, _she couldn't breathe_, the need to know a sudden, vicious, burning ache in her soul. She'd buried it for so long, kept the door closed tightly. But that part of her hadn't wasted away in that small, dark place deep inside her, it had festered and grown and now that she'd opened the door, Lili didn't think she'd ever get it closed again, not for as long as she lived. _She had to know_, had to see their faces and learn their names and touch them and talk to them and ask them thousands and thousands of questions--but how was she supposed to _breathe_ until she…

_Oh. Oh, God. _Was this how Scott felt about learning control?

Lili closed her eyes and pressed her hands flat to the table and somehow managed to drag a deep breath into her lungs. No wonder Scott was willing to risk everything. She would, too, to find her mother. She wouldn't be able to live with this terrible weight otherwise.

That meant she'd be leaving, that she'd do everything in her power to help Scott learn control. But whatever happened--one way or the other--she _had_ to find her family. The decision made, Lili suddenly, clearly knew what she had to do.

She found Rogue and Bobby at the same time, playing one of the table games in the living room. They were so intent on the game that neither of them saw her. They looked happy, relaxed, smiling and laughing as if Rogue hadn't come perilously close to dying only hours before. But the night's events had marked her, the shockingly white strands of hair somehow beautiful and frightening at the same time.

Moments later the game was over, Rogue and Bobby the clear winners, and Lili took her chance and managed to catch Bobby's attention, beckoning them from the raucous living room full of students enjoying their day off to the relative quiet of the hallway.

"Bobby told me what happened here last night," Rogue said by way of greeting, and Lili stilled when Rogue's gloved hand closed firmly around hers. "Sounds like we all had one helluva night."

"I guess so," Lili managed. And then she caught sight of the dog tags around Rogue's neck. Her stomach tightened. Those were Logan's. Had he…

Rogue followed Lili's gaze. "Oh, hey, Logan is fine, Lili. All healed up and already on his way out. He just gave this to me to hold on to until he's back."

All healed up? Already? _Wow_. He'd still looked pretty bad when she'd left him with Jean, and that hadn't been all that long ago. "I'm glad you're both all right," she smiled, squeezing Rogue's hand back before she gently reclaimed her own. "But where's Logan going?"

"Something he has to do," Rogue shrugged.

Him, too? There must be something going around. Or maybe, like Bobby had said, they all just had too much going on in their heads. Lili cleared her throat. "Actually, I've got something I need to do, too. That's why I wanted to talk to you. You've both been really nice to me and I… don't know how long I'll be gone."

"We'll keep your seat at the table," Bobby reassured her, Rogue nodding her agreement. _Just like that_. No questions asked, no explanations demanded. They really were her _friends_. One weight, at least, was off her shoulders.

"Thanks," Lili breathed around the lump in her throat. "Take care of each other. And… look, please don't take this the wrong way, but… watch out for Pyro."

"John?" Bobby blinked at her. "He's all right."

"I like him, too, Bobby. But he's got a mean streak," Lili softly warned. "He's the kind of guy who holds a grudge and doesn't ever believe he's wrong. Here, at a place like this, maybe he'll learn his way around it. Especially if he has friends like you two. You've already changed my mind about a lot of things, and I've only known you a few days. Just watch out for him, okay? And each other. That's all I'm saying."

"We can do that," Rogue agreed, in a new, more serious tone than Lili'd heard from her before. But then, how could anyone go through what had happened to Rogue without having it change them?

"I'll see you later, then," Lili said, meaning it. They returned to the living room and another game, leaving Lili free to focus on her second, more difficult task.

She found Scott in the garage with Logan next to a very sleek motorcycle, pausing when she spotted the tension between them in that first, single glance. Her eyes narrowed. What on earth were they competing over? They were both strong, both smart, both leaders… was this about the X-Men? It couldn't be over a woman, Jean was obviously with Scott. Except… Lili blinked, remembering Jean with Logan that morning. Had some of that tension she'd seen in Jean been because of _him_? Those subtle, possessive gestures--she'd assumed Jean was warning her to be careful with Scott, but what if she'd been wrong?

Something flashed through the air--keys, which Scott tossed and Logan easily caught. Whatever the conflict between them, there seemed to be at least a little respect, too. She'd almost missed it in all that male posturing. With a satisfied grin Logan swung his leg over the bike and the smooth, easy purr of a well-kept motor filled the garage. He drove off without a backward glance, Scott staring enigmatically after him. Lili swallowed, hard, breathing deeply to ease the knots in her stomach, and crossed to meet Scott as he walked slowly back to the house, deep in thought.

"I was just going to look for you," he smiled when he saw her. "The Professor wants to speak with us before we leave. Storm said you're all packed and ready to go?"

"Almost," Lili nodded, smoothing her damp palms down her brand new skirt and struggling for the calm that she'd rarely abandoned around Max, but that had been in precious short supply since she'd opened her eyes in this school.

Abruptly Scott stopped. "Lili, if you're having second thoughts, we don't have to go. I would never make you do something you don't--"

"That's not it at all. I think I understand why you need to do this, Scott, and I promise I'll do everything I can to help," she reassured him. And then she screwed up her courage and said the rest of it before she could talk herself out of it. "But there's something I need to do, too--and I'm going to need _your_ help."

"You didn't even need to ask, Lili. I'm happy to help you find your family."

Lili stepped back, startled. Was she that easy to read now? Had she always been? "No one ever used to know what I was thinking," she said softly. "At least--that's what I thought. But you always seem to see straight through me."

He shook his head. "Jean and the Professor are the ones with the telepathy, Lili--not me. I've just been here long enough to know we're usually either running _from _our family when we get to the school, or trying desperately to find them. Come on. Let's go talk to the Professor."

Her last stop. Nervously she nodded and fell into step beside him, and all too soon Scott was raising his hand to knock on the Professor's office door.

"Wait," Lili breathed, hanging back, her stomach a morass of knots. Scott paused to look at her, his hand falling slowly back to his side. "I'm not sure I'm ready for this," she confessed.

Scott's smile was understanding and sad and calm and reassuring all at once. "No one's ever really sure, Lili, no matter what they say. If it helps, though, I believe in you. And so does the Professor."

Helplessly she shook her head. "You barely know me."

"I'm an excellent judge of character," he said, turning to her and settling his hands warmly on her shoulders. "And sometimes, you just have to have faith in someone."

"That's never gotten me very far."

"You're here," he pointed out. "Don't you want to see what happens next?"

She felt a slow, reluctant smile start, and didn't try to stop it. "You make it sound like an adventure."

"What if it is?"

"There's so much I don't know, Scott," she insisted. "It was almost easier, not _caring_ like this, with nothing more to worry about than just surviving another day with Max. But everything has changed, and it's going to change again when I go in there, and I don't know what I'm doing any more."

_:Then perhaps it's time for you to learn, Liliana.:_

Lili shuddered head to toe at the touch of the Professor's mind.

_:And before you ask, I was _not_ reading your minds--you just happen to be talking right outside my door.:_

His words penetrated, full of calm strength and a gentle, dry humor, and she couldn't help but relax. Especially when she realized that Scott was trying not to laugh. "Come on, then," she sighed, pushing at him.

Scott opened the door for her and followed her through, each of them taking one of the large leather chairs grouped in front of the window where the Professor already sat. He smiled and held out a plain folder, nothing more than her name visible on the tab, and Lili's hands shook as she took it from him and flipped it open.

There was a small, slim, black portfolio that Lili let fall into her lap. The first three pages behind it were full of names and dates. "What are these?"

The Professor sighed. "I'm afraid those are the names of all the girls who would be roughly your age who also disappeared around the time when we believe Max took you."

Lili's jaw dropped. "All of these children are missing?"

"Young women, now, Liliana," the Professor corrected her. "Did you know you're approximately twenty years old?"

Twenty? _Twenty?_ "I never lived more than one day at a time with Max," Lili admitted. "I don't even have a birthday." Her gaze fell, spellbound, to name after name after name. Was she in there? Was her family? "How do I…"

"I've hired an agency to investigate your identity," the Professor informed her, and Lili's head shot up in shock. "I've given them what few facts we have to help them narrow down that list. Once they have, they'll investigate further until they find at least one surviving family member for each child. If we have to, we can pursue DNA testing to find a match, but I'm confident that once I have the names of potential relatives, I can use Cerebro to--"

"Why would you do that?" Lili finally managed.

The Professor and Scott exchanged a surprized glance.

"Finding out who you were before Max took you is the fastest way to find your family," Scott explained. Except that wasn't the question she'd asked.

"No--why would you do that _for me_?" she pressed, pushing anxiously to her feet, the little portfolio falling to the floor and the entire folder now shaking in her hands. "I haven't said I'll join the X-Men, I have no idea if I'll be able to show Scott so much as one single thing about his powers, I have absolutely no way to pay you back for all these people to--"

"Liliana," the Professor gently, firmly interrupted. "Calm yourself, please, and sit back down."

God, she was _panicking_. She hadn't panicked since… since _ever_. Lili dropped back into the chair like a stone, but she couldn't look at either of them, turning her head away to stare unseeing out the window as she fiercely reined herself in. "I'm sorry," she said, when she was sure she could at least _sound_ calm.

"No apology is necessary," the Professor said, his matter-of-fact voice almost as soothing as Scott's to her frazzled nerves. "I assure you, Liliana, I don't need your money--more than half my students don't pay a thing to be here--and even if you can't teach Scott or you don't remain as an X-Man, you won't ever owe me anything at all for helping you now."

That ache was back, that _longing_, exploding in her chest and stealing her breath and stinging the backs of her eyes. She hadn't cried in years and years, she realized, suddenly afraid that if she opened that door, it would be another she wouldn't ever be able to close. Lili found a notch in the paneling and she stared at it, hard, for a long, long moment, until her breathing slowed a little and she no longer felt like she was going to fall apart at their feet.

Only then did she turn back to Scott and the Professor. "I don't know what to say."

Scott leaned down to retrieve the little portfolio and offered it back to her. "I told you, Lili--as long as it's the truth, you can say just about anything you want."

She searched that ruby red gaze. "Then the truth is, I can't figure out what you expect from me."

"Whatever you have to give will be more than enough." Scott reached for her hand, gently folding her fingers around the portfolio. "The rest of the folder is basically press clippings and anything else the Professor and I could find on your years with Max, so you don't have to read it if you don't want to. But you should open that now."

She stared down at it, half curious, half terrified, and _entirely_ aware that if she didn't face up to this now, she'd never find her way. Lili flipped the portfolio open.

Birth certificate, diploma, passport, student identification from Charles Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, all in the name of Liliana August. Tucked neatly behind them was a piece of paper that looked frighteningly legal. Lili glanced up at the Professor.

"Until we know your real name, my contact in the governor's office has agreed to issue these to you based on the name you've been using all these years and what few documents we could find. That other document simply states that I have agreed to be your legal guardian until your real age can be verified. And all _that _means is that the bureaucrats want to be sure someone will be responsible for you if you get into trouble. It's something I do for all of our runaways. All right?"

He was so calm, and smiling, as if he knew he'd just completely turned her world upside down _again_ and yet--somehow--wasn't afraid that she'd get into a _huge_ bit of trouble or lose herself in his huge, terrifying world or take advantage of what looked like the most generous thing anyone would ever do for her. Lili didn't know if she'd ever be able to prove herself worthy of the trust he'd just placed in her. But she knew she'd rather die trying than disappoint Charles Xavier.

Lili took a deep breath, pressing her hand to the odd tension in her belly, and tried to smile. "You do this for all the mutants you find?"

"Only the ones who need it."

"I'll never be able to thank you enough, Professor."

"You just did."

"Come on," Scott smiled, rising and helping her to her feet with a gentle hand at her elbow. "I'm in the mood for a drive--how about you?"

"I still don't know where we're going," she half protested, clutching both folder and portfolio to her in the sudden rush of excitement that filled her.

"By the time we stop tonight, Pennsylvania," Scott informed her. "At the end of the trip, Nellis Air Force Base."

Lili blinked. "And I still don't know where we're going."

"Nellis is in the western part of Nevada, near Death Valley," Scott clarified.

"_Death Valley_? Very encouraging."

"Very hot," the Professor corrected, following them to the door of his office. "No one will notice if you raise the temperature a few degrees, and their testing grounds are remote and already quite scorched. Drive carefully, Scott. And good luck to you both."

"Thanks, Professor."

They passed any number of students on the way to Lili's room for her bags and then back out to the garage, but it all passed in a blur to her. Lili settled into the front seat of a beautiful silver-grey Porsche, only then relinquishing the portfolio to Scott. He tossed it into the back seat and went around to the driver's side, and Lili finally realized they were _going_--and that Jean, Ororo, and Rogue, Bobby, Peter, and Kitty were all there to see them off.

Grinning ear to ear, Scott pressed a quick, fierce kiss to Jean's mouth and waved to everyone else, then pulled open the door and dropped into the driver's seat. "Ready, Lili?"

The engine roared to life. Lili didn't think she'd ever been less ready--or more excited--for as long as she could remember. This was it. This was life with the Professor and the X-Men, with friends, with choices.

Her heart pounding, her hands tingling, Lili leaned back in her seat and buckled her seatbelt. "Just don't lose me out there, Scott."

"Not a chance," he grinned.

Finally. This was _her_ life, and she wanted it. _Now_. Whatever the price.

"Then let's go," she breathed.

The late afternoon sun dazzled her as they cleared the garage, and for the first time in her life, Lili faced the open road and the whole, wide world and Max and his rules were nowhere to be found. But she didn't need Max, and she never had to live by his rules again. It was Scott who sat behind the wheel, and the Professor wasn't any farther away than a phone call, and Lili knew that all she had to do was pay attention and she'd always be able to find her way back.

_She could find her own way._ Lili laughed and opened her window, and raised her face to the wind.

X Timeline

Scenes One, Two, and Three happen on the first day of the story, the day before Jean testifies before Congress and Senator Kelly in X-Men, the motion picture. Scene Four begins late on the first day, but ends just before dawn on the second day.

Scenes Five and Six skip to late in the second day, the same day that Logan and Marie meet in Canada and Storm and Cyclops save them from Sabretooth and bring them back to the school. This is also the same day that Magneto kidnaps Senator Kelly.

Scenes Seven through Ten occur on the third day, while Logan, now recovered, is learning about the school, then unintentionally hurts Rogue that night when she tries to wake him from his nightmare.

Scenes Eleven and Twelve take place on the fourth day, when Magneto takes Rogue at the train station, Senator Kelly dies, and Jean uses Cerebro.

Scenes Thirteen through Fifteen take place late on the fourth day, after the events on Liberty Island. The final scene, Sixteen, occurs the following day, the fifth day of this story.


End file.
